Campus News:
Last week you were clued in on some future construction. The current construction is rather tame so far this summer. The major work involves an addition to the Stepan chemistry building. The addition is filling in the space that used to be open between the building and the road that leads west to LaFortune. The addition will be equal in height to the rest of the building and involves multiple floors.
One construction project has already been completed. Six new basketball courts have been built immediately west of the bookstore. All the lines have been painted and the new baskets installed. The surface is smooth asphalt with very small aggregate. Much nicer surface for playing ball. The courts by McGlinn have asphalt with large stones that are quite hard on the joints. The new baskets are double rimmed just like The Rock. Absolutely no give. Shooting percentages will not be helped by such unfriendly rims.
These courts were built to replace the eight at Stepan. Stepan is currently fenced off and awaiting heavy machinery. The Stepan courts are to be torn up and replaced by a new Post Office/Security building. Construction is expected to start soon.
So it looks like the Bookstore Finals will be moved by the Bookstore. Guess that makes sense. However, the land is very flat. No hillsides to accommodate a larger audience. Maybe stands will be put on all four sides to maximize viewing space.
Campus Urban Legends from Scholastic continued:
More on the Zahm-first-in-flight story that was told last week...
During the late 1880s and early 1890s, Zahm worked in the Science Hall (now LaFortune Student Center), researching and testing design for gliders. Zahm successfully launched the first man-carrying glider from the roof of the Science Hall during this time, and he was well known for his "night launches" from the rooftops of campus buildings.
One night, in what was possibly the beginning of Zahm-related crazy antics, Zahm's assistant was testing a model glider Zahm had built and suspended from the ceiling in what is now the lobby of LaFortune. While soaring around the room, the assistant had to use his feet to stop himself from hitting the walls, leaving shoe prints high above the ground. The next morning the curator of the Science Hall found the shoe prints and attributed them to supernatural causes - namely the Devil and his evil spirits. He was so convinced of this that he had the room blessed with holy water.
Hall Notes:
The year was 1977. Twas the first year of our Lord that undergrads occupied the Hall by the lake. Terry Coonan '81 was a freshman in the Fall of '77 and he was kind enough to provide some information. One hundred ten Vermin entered Carroll. Terry had this to say...
"It wasn't even on the campus map at the time. It turns out that we were the retards who had turned our housing applications in too late and so were punished by being assigned to Carroll. It was the best thing that ever happened to us."
Hear! Hear! Terry continued...
"As the original class of Vermin, we were pretty much left to our own devices. We originated waterdropping, the Carroll Hall Happy Hour, and kept a canoe in the basement for (illegal) nighttime canoeing on St. Mary's Lake. We also went through 4 rectors in 4 years (we seem to have been rough on rectors!)"
NDSportscenter:
Ryan Humphrey was drafted by the Utah Jazz with the 19th pick in the first round of the NBA Draft. Ryan was later traded to Orlando. More on Humphrey next week.
For the sixth straight year we won the Big East Commissioner's Trophies. This was the seventh year in a row for the men, who have won it every year we have been in the Big East. The men collected 102.5 points, 20 more than second place UConn. The women's side was less competitive. Our ladies scored their highest point total ever with 121.5. That was 45.5 more than second place UConn.
Backup running back Cory Jones has transferred because of a desire to be closer to home. The Seattle-native will be moving on to the University of Washington. Jones had just completed his freshman year. He logged zero minutes last season.
The freshmen will be finding their way to campus come August. Hopefully recruit Derek Landri will be ready to perform. The lineman broke his leg and dislocated his ankle after a BMX bike accident. The prognosis was that Landri would be ready for Fall practice. That should bode will for Derek. He was a top recruit and could see action right away. Usually freshmen lineman rarely see the field. However, Coach Willingham had made it open season on all positions and apparently has a history of playing any year of player and not designating players to be blatantly red-shirted.
Women's crew has risen exponentially since becoming a varsity sport a few short years ago. This year they got as high as #9, the highest ranking in team history. The Irish came in second to Syracuse at the Big East Rowing Challenge and finished the year #15 in the nation. The ladies also made their first even appearance at the NCAA Championships. ND was represented by a varsity eight boat, our only boat to qualify. The NCAAs were held in Indianapolis and the crew finished fourth in the "C" final. With that finish the women secured 16th place for ND at the NCAAs. Coach Martin Stone was named one of six finalists for the NCAA Rowing Coach of the Year.
Campus News:
Construction is slated to begin next summer for the Science Teaching Facility. It will be built at the site of the parking lot in front of Rolfs Sports Recreation Center and will free up space in Nieuwland Science Hall for faculty and student research. The building process is expected to take two years.
The $70 million, 202,000 square foot building will contain two 275-seat lecture halls, one 150-seat multimedia visualization lecture hall, one 40-seat classroom, 40 teaching labs, a greenhouse, a herbarium, and a museum component. All classrooms in Nieuwland will continue to be used, but all teaching labs will be moved to the new facility.
No word yet on where the new parking lot will be or if they will expand an existing one. Obviously the new one will be farther away from campus. Not certain whether walking shoes will be provided to the ever exercising staff which will most likely now be parking somewhere near Fort Wayne.
From Scholastic, a piece on Urban Legends:
The men of Zahm Hall have definitely created a mystique for themselves over the years. From the wild and crazy antics of the traditional Zahm Winter Carnival to the infamous Bun Run (which requires no explanation), their reputation is well known on campus. And, as legend has it, the namesake of our very own Zahm Hall also was the first man to fly. Could someone of this crazy breed really have preceded the Wright brothers in flight? Well, not exactly. Zahm Hall was named after the Rev. John Zahm: priest, physical chemist, evolutioniist and university vice president. The man behind the legend actually is his younger brother, Dr. Albert Zahm. Dr. Zahm attend the university as an undergraduate and later returned as an aeronautics professor. He was later appointed as Notre Dame's first mechanical engineering professor.
In 1893, Zahm organized the first-ever International Aeronautical Congress, which was held in Chicago. It was here that Zahm presented his paper "Stability of Aeroplanes and Flying Machines." With this paper, he became the first person in American to explain the method for launching an aircraft. Sitting in the audience were two then- unknown brothers from Dayton, Ohio by the names of Wilbur and Orville Wright. The Wright brothers went on to make the first powered, controlled airplane flight in December 1903.
So, Dr. Albert Zahm may have been a highly innovative engineer, but as for an aeronautical connection to the hallowed halls of Zahm? This urban legend has definitley crashed.
Hall Notes:
Carroll won the Fisher Regatta for the third year in a row. The Vermin rowed the three-year-old vessel "Wood 'n Caulk" to victory. This championship was not without spice, though. Vermin Steve Bomeli '02 tells the tale:
"In the semi-final race this year, guys from Keough started attacking our boat to try and break one of the outriggers so that the boat might flip over. We just pulled ahead and smeared them in that race, and as we rowed back across the lake, they started rowing towards us (not even having finished the race yet) and again tried a second attack. One of their guys jumped on one of our outriggers which caused the boat to flip over. We got back on top of the upside down boat and were towed back to shore by the water safety. One of the seams on the boat broke during the whole ordeal, so we needed some wood to go and fix it. Several of the rowers took Keough's boat to cut it up and take its wood for the repairs, and there were almost some punches thrown. In the end, we found some other scrap wood and made a quick repair on the site, put the boat back in the water, and won the final race.
At the next hall president's council, Keough declared war on Carroll (I really don't know what this means) since they accused us of starting things even though they were the aggressors."
I'm not sure what Keough's nickname is but I'll got out on a limb and say they are the "Donkeys."
NDSportscenter:
Drama. Of the highest degree. Bottom of the 9th. One out. Senior centerfielder Steve Stanley at the plate. Irish down 3 to 2. SMACK! Turn on the wheels as the ball bounds into the gap. Triple. A single followed to know the game at 3. RF Brian Stavisky then boomed a shot over the right field fence. Ball game. Irish eliminate #1 Rice (after previously beating #1 FSU) and advanced in the College World Series.
The USC coach said Steve Stanley is the best leadoff hitter he had seen in 16 years. Baseball America called Steve the "best player under 5'10" ". Stanley was selected by the A's in the 2nd round of the recent MLB draft. Junior Stavisky was taken in the 6th round by the A's. The Rockies grabbed senior 3B Andrew Bushey in the 15th and expect to convert him to catcher. Finally senior catcher Paul O'Toole went to the Cubs in the 21st round.
We again had to face Stanford in the next game of the College World Series. Their experience and poise proved too much as they came away with a 5-3 wing. Three pitches into the game we were down 2-0. Ouch. The lads fought back but couldn't get the necessary runs. Great run by the winningest squad in ND history. The victory over Rice was #50, the most ever by an Irish team. We finished tied for fifth in the nation. A very fine accomplishment. Also a very fine statement. We'll be back.
The Omaha media gave ND credit for the surge in attendance at this year's College World Series. Records were set at every session the Domers played in.
The softball team won the Big East regular season again. They headed into the Big East tourney as the #1 seed. The ladies were upset in the first game by Virginia Tech. The double elimination tournament continued for the Irish. The squad battled back from the losers bracket and beat the Hokies twice to win the crown and get an automatic bid to the NCAA Tournament. The Irish then went to Iowa as the #3 seed in Region 7. The Hawkeyes were the first victim as they were beaten 3-2. Oregon State gave us our first loss at 2-0. Double elimination, though. We got a second shot at OSU and gave them their second loss, 2-0. The lady Irish advanced to the Region final versus #1 seed Nebraska. The 'Huskers moved on after a 5-3 triumph. The Domers finished the year 44-17 after an 8-12 start.
Campus News:
NDToday.com, the student run website, is nowing giving the Bookstore some competition. The site has opened an auction feature that will most likely be used for textbooks. This was done in response to a student demand for an online forum. This is believed to be the first site- specific university auction feature in the nation. NDToday co-founder Robert Pazornik sees this as being a positive alternative to Hammes in an effort to "level the marketplace." Website officials hope it will ultimately be the #1 campus book seller. Pazornik expects a negative reaction from Hammes and the University. In the past cry-baby administrators and faculty have given unfavorable feedback to NDToday for such things as the on-line teacher evaluations. B-O-O. H-O-O. Bookstore officials did not answer phone calls from The Observer about the new auction aspect. The auction will operate free of charge to only ND, St. Mary's, and Holy Cross students. A few items were available this past spring, but sales are expected to pick up in the fall. NDToday officials in the future will attempt to open the auctions to faculty and staff on the three campuses. The company will not even entertain the idea of taking a small percentage of auction sales until the fall of 2004 at the earliest. If the auctions are a hit, NDToday will attempt to roll out the plan at other schools. Road trip, baby!
From Scholastic, a piece on campus Urban Legends:
After marveling at the beauty of the Golden Dome as it sparkles against a blue sky, females arriving on the Notre Dame campus for the first time often notice the prevalence of beauty of another kind - in the physically fit and attractive young men who flood the quads. Most Notre Dame women would agree that their male classmates are, in general, a cut above when it comes to looks. However, did Playgirl really rank the men of Notre Dame as the second-best-looking group of college men in the nation? Sorry, guys, but no. Playgirl never published a list of the colleges with the most beautiful men. In fact, no such survey can be found among the vast wonders of the Internet. So where did this urban legend come from? Most likely, some random guy was flipping through his Playboy one day and saw that the illustrious magazine had published a list of colleges with the best-looking women (which it did, in 2001; the University of Texas topped the list). He then decided to impress the ladies at dorm parties later that night by insisting that Playgirl had published a similar list, ranking him and his male colleagues as among the most attractive. Believable? Mabye. True? No.
Hall Notes:
This is a short story from Ryan "O-Dogg" O'Leary '96 called "White Yoda."
While listening to some urban tunes in room 205 sophomore year, Bill (Edwards '96) and I were accosted by White Yoda and told in some incoherent manner to turn it down. When I asked him to speak in English, he turned red and retorted, "I'll say what I want...when I want." He then stormed out without noticing that the volume knob went untouched. Victory.
NDSportscenter:
The Irish baseball team visited the College World Series for the first time in 45 years. This is only our second time at the World Series. Let's go back a bit in this season.... The fellas started the year 9-10 and opened Big East play with four losses. Then they found their groove. The team rattled off a 16 game win streak and at one point had won 25 of 27. They re-entered the top 25 in the polls. The Irish were led by centerfielder Steve Stanley, who climbed to 8th in the nation in batting, and had a team ERA that rose into the top ten. The squad made the four team Big East tournament and started the post-season run. Rutgers was knocked off 8-3. The Scarlet Knights were also the last Big East team the Irish faced in the double elimination tourney. We defeated them again and gained an automatic NCAA berth. ND was one of 16 locations to host an NCAA Regional. We were the #2 seed. South Alabama was #1 in our Regional. 'Bama didn't know what hit 'em. The Irish banged out 32 hits, scored 25 runs, had 59 total bases, 5 homers, 6 doubles, and 3 triples. And the game wasn't even that close. The team won its first ever Regional title with a 9-6 victory over Ohio State. We entered that game at #16 in the nation. By the time we played Florida State in the Super-Regional, we were up to #11. FSU was the #1 team in the country. The Irish had to win 2 out of 3 down in Tallahassee. In Game 1 the boys again took to the offensive. We won out 10-4 with a freshman pitcher leading the way. FSU's 25-game win streak was ended. The Seminoles bounced back with a 12-5 win. Another first year hurler took the mound for us and limited the powerful FSU batting order to one measly run in the rubber match. We scored 3 and made it to the final eight for the first time since 1957. Freshman Chris Niesel, a Florida native, scatterd 6 Florida State hits over 8 innings to get us to baseball's big dance. We weren't supposed to make it this far, obviously. The amazing thing is that we did this with a mostly freshman pitching staff and a third string shortstop. Not bad, eh?
The opening game for us in Omaha was versus perennial Nebraska-visitor Stanford. The Irish entered ranked #6. Stanford came in at #5. The guys gave it a run but fell 4-3. They outhit the Cardinal 10-8. Shortstop Javier Sanchez smacked a 3-run dinger off the Stanford pitcher who was a recent 1st round draft pick by Cleveland. We play Rice on Monday at 2:30pm on ESPN2, I believe.
Julius Jones has apparently flunked out of school. Son of a... The University dismissed him for "academic reasons." Rising sophomore Ryan Grant is now our most experienced returning back. Ouch.
Campus News:
One last note about Commencement. Sydney Pollack, of Hollywood fame, was one of a dozen to receive an honorary degree. Pollack is a show business jack of all trades. He was acted but is more known for directing and producing. His most notable recent directing credits are "The Firm" (1993) and "Sabrina" (1995). Pollack's producing has aimed more at film quality than box office receipts. His own production company, Mirage Productions, has backed a series of critically acclaimed films including "The Fabulous Baker Boys" (1989), "Dead Again" (1991), "Searching for Bobby Fischer" (1993), "Sense and Sensibility" (1995), and last year's "Iris." The feather in Sydney's cap is 1985's "Out of Africa" for which he won Oscars for both directing and producing. Pollack is a native of South Bend. He will serve on a newly formed advisory council for the performing arts at Notre Dame, along with some other big industry names: Martin Scorsese, Susan St. James, and Phil Donahue.
Lou Nanni is switching positions again. He is moving from the vice president for Public Affairs and communication to vice president for University Relations. Nanni will be replacing the retiring William Sexton. The position will involve the direction of four general areas in University relations: Development, Alumni Relations, Internal Advancement, and Special Events. Nanni is an '84 grad, served as a Holy Cross Associate in Chile, has been a University Trustee, and was the executive director of the Center for the Homeless.
Campus Watch by the Gipper from Scholastic:
Last weekend a group of O'Neilites decided to hijack a goose. No, the Gipp isn't talking about another tacky dining hall ornament - he's talking about a real, live, kicking bird. Apparently, the way to capture a goose is to feed it slowly at first until it gets close, and then throw a trash bag over it. And then hold on tight. And then put it in your buddy's room while he is sleeping. And then wait for him to wake up. The poor victim (the sleeper, not the goose) awoke to cascades of that substance that geese know best shooting over his books, his carpet, his coffee table...you get the picture. The poor fellow barely escaped from his bed before recruiting help in ushering the goose out the window, and coating every surface in the room with bleach. This is the greatest prank the Gipper has heard in a long time, although at the same time, he's glad he wasn't there.
Hall Notes:
Time to bring you up to speed on a few Vermin alums. These are updates to some lads whose bios are already posted. Ryan "O-Dogg" O'Leary provided all the info. Here's the scoop on O-Dogg for the man himself...
I'm on the move again...settled in Chicago as of July 2001, working for the Sun-Times and The Times of Munster, IN. However, I'm still looking for an excuse to return east, so this might be subject to change soon. As for the recording efforts, I'm currently sitting on 7 completed tracks for a second LP, trying to track down beats for the 15 or 20 songs I have written and waiting. If I get some music, and some money to put it out...there'll be product out soon.
O-Dogg is also privy to the happenings of some other Vermin. A smattering of info follows...
William Edwards is currently at the University of Georgia, working toward an MBA and trying to avoid real life for as long as possible. He's still involved with the Army Reserves, but won't be taking any overseas missions anytime soon.
John Schuring is married and working for Young and Rubicam in Kansas City.
Kevin Reichart is working as an accountant for TriZeChahn here in Chicago. NDSportscenter: The men's tennis team rose to as high as #4 in the nation this year. The men had their best year since 1994 when they were 21-9. The team was the #1 seed in the Big East tourney. They went on to beat Miami in the Championship. The men finished the regular and Big East seasons as the #14 team in the country. They received an automatic bid to the NCAAs by winning the Big East. The men were given the #14 seed and hosted the first and second rounds of the tournament. They defeated Michigan in the first round and Purdue in the second. However, the third Big Ten team they faced proved too much. #3 Illinois knocked off the Irish 4-1 and ended their season with a 23-7 record. Individual players continued on after the team rounds. More on them later.
The women's tennis team did not have quite as good a season as the men. The ladies entered the Big East tournament as the #1 seed but lost to Miami in the championship. The women fell to #21 and were 14-13. They were fortunate to receive an at-large big to the NCAA field of 64 team. The team finished the year 14-14 after Wisconsin defeated them 4-2 in the first round.
The women's lacrosse team achieved a high ranking of #7, the highest in the 6-year history of the program. They finished the season at #8 and received their first ever NCAA bid. The lady Irish rallied from a 3 goal deficit to beat Ohio State 11-7 in the first round of the NCAA tourney. They advanced to take on #2 seed Princeton in the quarterfinals. The Tigers were too much for the Irish, knocking them off 11-5. Five players were then named to the first and second All Big East teams. Junior Danielle Shearer was named the Big East Midfielder of the Year.
Campus News:
Father Hesburgh has justed turned 85. The day before his birthday he received his 150th honorary degree. This one was received at the May 26th University of San Diego commencement. Hesburgh holds the Guiness Book World Record for honorary degrees received. San Diego gave a doctor of humane letters degree. Father Ted is continually singled out because of his work off-campus as well as on. Richard Conklin, a former associate vice president for university relations, stated: "This is hardly a university president, and certainly none alive, who can match that double career of [higher education] as well as public service." Hesburgh has had 16 presidential appointments and is most proud of his role to help pass the Civil Rights Act of 1964. Father has also played a major role in helping to reduce the number of nuclear arms and reduce world hunger. Hesburgh still keeps busy. He presides over Masses, writes and autographs books, and travels for various international and national committee meetings.
Father John Smyth '57 received the Laetare Medal at the 2002 Commencement. This is Catholic America's oldest honor. Smyth is a Chicago priest who has spent the last 40 years working at a residence for orphaned and homeless children. Monk had this to say on bestowing Smyth the honor: "[T]his year we particularly wish to celebrate the exemplary manner in which he has served Christ in the children who are victims of neglect, prostitution, sexual abuse, and family violence." Smyth was a basketball star in his undergrad days. He was a team captain and honorable mention All-American. Father John was selected by the St. Louis Hawks in the 3rd round of the NBA draft but turned down the offer to enter the priesthood.
Campus Watch by the Gipper from Scholastic:
The Gipp's favorite tip involves an AR and a freshman. (No, this has nothing to do with the sort of stuff the Pope has been talking about lately.) Apparently the young gents of Keenan Hall, in a desperate attempt to escape the gray piping and gray skies under which they spend their days, initiated a dorm-wide game of "Assassins." The rules are as follows: Each participant is assigned another, whom he has to shoot with a dart gun within an allotted time frame. So everyone is watching his back, and trying to get someone else in the process. Apparently, the elderly Nintendos of Keenan are all on the blink, because some residents appear to have consumed themselves with the game. The Gipper has even heard reports of COMPUTER ENGINEERS STAYING IN THEIR ROOMS on Friday nights to avoid being targeted. Unbelievable.
So, to get back to the story, the frosh in question had been assigned an outgoing AR as his target. As the game deadline approached, the AR decided to hop in his little gray Mazda, conveniently parked in the building lot, and to drive off to evade capture. However, in a daring deed of action-movie delusion, the frosh caught his target as he was pulling away, and hopped onto the roof of the automobile.
The AR, adrenaline pumping at the threat of being dropped with a floppy rubber dart, drove madly around campus, trying to shake the frosh. But his efforts were fruitless in the face of steely, pre-pubescent determination, and so the AR cleverly decided to drive to the NDSP station and pull into a reserved spot. Amazingly, not ten seconds later, A POLICE CAR PULLED UP. The unamused cop dragged out friend the AR into his Crown Vic for some information, at which point the freshman pointed his gun in the window and shot him in the head.
The Gipper's favorite part of the story: The AR went home with a Res Life summons. Sweet, sweet irony.
Hall Notes:
So who has a little wooden replica of Carroll on thier shelf? If you bought one from way back in the day then you have a bare backside. However, if you've purchased within the past few years then you have probably noticed a paragraph on the back giving a history lesson on Carroll. We had taken that lengthy note and put it at the head of our Carroll Hall History page. Well, thanks to the "search" command on the internet, everyone and their mother can locate specific words and find their way to the page to read said paragraph. The third sentence in the paragraph drew one curious reader. He was looking for information on Brother Andre Bessate. The sentence stated: "For a brief time in 1938, Blessed Brother Andre Bessate lived in this special building." VerminNet.com was sent an email asking where this sentence came from. The inquirer was a Domer writer living in Toronto who was researching Brother Bessate as part of his job. So he certainly knew quite a bit about the man. How interesting I found it when this Domer informed me that Brother Bessate died in 1937. D'OH! So unless Carroll doubled as a mortuary, the research department dropped the ball big time.
NDSportscenter:
The state prosecutor has decided to pursue the four former football players accused of rape by a twenty year old student. Formal charges were issued, warrants were out for their arrests (all were expected to turn themselves in voluntarily), and bond was declared. The local newspaper was quite descriptive in telling of the events of that early morning as stated in the police report that came from the woman's recollection.
And then there was one. Quarterback Matt LoVecchio has decided to transfer. Strange considering Coach Willingham had named no starter and that Holiday and he were neck-and-neck for the position. This, coupled with Jared Clark moving to tight end, means Carlyle is the only QB left from that class. The backup will be freshman-to-be Chris Olsen who was quite heralded in high school. He is recovering from a torn knee ligament but should be near 100% for the Fall. The third quarterback will be walk-on Pat Dillingham who performed quite well in the spring. LoVecchio has no idea what school he plans to now call home.
Track and Field notes: The men won the 6,400 meter relay at the Drake Relays. Anchor Luke Watson overcame a 50 mete deficit to the NCAA cross country champion to cross the finish line first. This was our first win in any relay since '86 and our first victory at Drake since 1942....The women took second and the men third at the Big East Outdoor Track and Field Championships. That is the highest the woman have ever finished. Liz Grow won the 400 meters and was a vital component of the 4x100 relay. She became the first female Domer to win the Most Outstanding Track Performer award....Luke Watson became the third Domer to be named the Male Most Outstanding Track Performer after winning the 3000 meters and 5000 meters. Ryan Shay came in second to Watson in the 5000 and lapped the field in the 10,000 meters to win by almost one full second.
Campus News:
Many nationally known people visited campus this past spring. In March Jim Lehrer gave a lecture on journalism. Lehrer is the executive editor and anchor of "The News Hour with Jim Lehrer" which airs on PBS.
Dick Ebersol, the executive producer of NBC Sports, also spoke on campus. He was one of the speakers featured at the Student International Business Council Forum
Business man Warren Buffet spoke very recently. He is known the world over for his success as a stock market investor. Buffet is the CEO of Berkshire Hathaway Inc. which has holdings in excess of $2 billion. To meet the demands of the ample audience, the 70-year-old gave his lecture, which included a Q&A session, in the JACC.
In April we hosted the first conference in the U.S. dedicated to the United Nations Global Compact. The conference addressed the UN's new initiative to diffuse the benefits of global economic development through voluntary corporate policies and actions. The senior officer of the Executive Office of the Secretary General and director of the UN Global Compact Office delivered the keynote address. (Whew! That was a mouth-full. How does he fit that title on a business card?) Some of the companies sending representatives were Hewlett-Packard, Mattell, Motorola, Nike, and Shell Oil.
Campus Watch by the Gipper from Scholastic:
"Tsk. Tsk. Tsk." Thus began a letter that the Gipper received this week from an upset student. She claimed that there is plenty to do besides drink, and that the Gipp simply wasn't putting enough faith in the student body's creative powers when he said that there was too little to do. "In the same March edition of the Scholastic," she wrote, "there was a five-page spread about all the arts events going on on campus, and numerous articles on multiple sports venues, concerts and lectures which were available for students to attend." Sadly, dear respondent, the five-page spread was about the art department, not "art events." And, as much as the Gipp loves lectures, he gets enough of those during the week. However, your point is appreciated. Maybe the Gipper is just jaded by campus events after accidentally stumbling in on an SR-71 concert last semester.
Hall Notes:
The Vermin Class of '02 made some noise at the end of the school year. Tim Dolezal was named the 2002 Class Valedictorian. Not too shabby. (For the record, I was nearly the Valedictorian of the '97 class. I would have been, too, if it weren't for the 1000 or so students with higher GPAs.) If you read your most recent Alumni Newsletter then you already know of the award bestowed on Bob LeBlanc. Bob was honored with the Alumni Association's Distinguished Student Award. He was on every dean's list and a two-time Carroll co-president. Bob started out as a freshman class representative and finished up as co-chair of the Halll Presidents Council and as a representative on the Campus Life Council. Congratulations to them and the rest of the '02 Vermin.
NDSportscenter:
Former head football coach Dan Devine passed away at the age of 77. Devine took over after Ara stepped down. He led the Irish to a 53-16-1 record in 5 years. Devine produced a National Championship in 1977 and won three bowl games.
The players named in the accused rape are saying they did nothing wrong. All appealed their expulsions. While the appeals were taking place the players were allowed to take their final exams. However, if they lose the appeals the tests will be thrown out. Abe Elam has come out and said he did not have any sexual contact with the woman at all. The other three players said the intercourse was consensual. All the appeals were sent directly to Monk. Knott Hall, the home of Elam and Lorenzo Crawford, wrote a letter that vouched for the character of the two men. Dorm residents signed the letter and then forwarded it to Father Malloy. Well, Monk denied all the appeals and the students are no longer enrolled.
The women's swimming and diving team sent nine participants to the NCAA Championships, the most ever for the team. Senior Carrie Nixon earned All-American honors with a 7th place finish in the 50 meter freestyle. In the process she set a school record with a time of 22.53 seconds. Nixon ended her career with ten total All-American or honorable mention All-American honors. Senior Kelly Hecking garnered an honorable mention All-American nod. Kelly went to the NCAAs all four of her years and earned honorable mention All-American honors all four years. Heather Mattingly was our first ever diver to compete at the NCAAs. After finishing 12th in the 1-meter board event she was an honorable mention All-American. After finishing in the top 8 in the 3-m diving she was an All-American. The women's team as a whole at the NCAAs came in 19th place.
Senior basketball forward Erica Haney was drafted in the 3rd round (47th overall) by the Detroit Shock of the WNBA.
We landed another basketball recruit who will be joining the squad this coming year. Omari Peterkin of St. Thomas of the Virgin Islands has signed a letter of intent to play for the Irish. Omari is a 6'8", 250 lb. forward/center. He was an unknown until Coach Brey viewed a tape of him. Official stats were not really a top priority in St. Thomas, but he dominated all the games he played in. Peterkin made a visit to campus and played with the team. They spoke very highly of his game and it was a no-brainer for Brey to make the scholarship offer. We won out over UConn. Omari carries a 3.3 GPA, scored a 1100 on the SAT, and plans to be a biology major. A hidden gem from some obscure island? Maybe another Tim Duncan. OK, maybe not that good. Coach Brey still have four scholarships at his disposal.
Campus News:
Mexican President Vicente Fox is out as the keynote speaker for the 157th Commencement. Mexican government officials told the University that because of political conditions in Mexico, Fox would be prevented from making the trip. The Mexican Senate also stopped Fox from taking a proposed trip last month to the U.S. and Canada. It is believed this is the first commencement speaker cancellation in school history.
In place of Fox the University has secured Tim Russert, moderator of NBC's "Meet the Press." Russert last visited campus for a lecture in November of 2000. Along with giving the keynote address, Russert will receive an honorary doctor of law degree. Russert is a graduate of John Carroll University and has a law degree from the Cleveland-Marshall College of Law. He is also a member of the bar in New York and Washington.
Russert joined NBC News in 1984 and seven years later joined "Meet the Press," the longest running program in television history (this is year #53). Tim is also a political analyst for NBC and appears on the Today show and Tom Brokaw's half-hour shift. Russert is the senior vice president and Washington bureau chief for NBC News and a contributing anchor for MSNBC. He also has his own program - "The Tim Russert Show" - on CNBC. Prior to his journalistic career, Tim was a special counsel in the U.S. Senate and in the New York state government.
Campus Watch by the Gipper from Scholastic:
A young woman of the Pasquerillas was returning from a night out at South Bend's exclusive marina not too long ago, filled with delicious Keystone Light, in a cab filled to capacity. While the driver was busy collecting money from the six dozen or so other occupants, she decided to take the car for a test drive around Main Circle. So she popped it into gear and took off, doors wipe open, back-seat passengers scrambling to stay inside, and cabbie staring in shock. When she returned, our friend handed the driver her money and walked off, as though nothing had happened.
Hall Notes:
Last week I filled you in on the most current Bookstore tourney. Now I bring you a story from a Bookstore of yesteryear. A little setup...
Time: Spring of '95
Setting: A first round Bookstore game behind the old Bookstore
Vermin storyteller: Mike "Rangers" Reider '97
Event: Classic Moment in Vermin History known as "The Lone Ranger"
Being a Notre Dame student, I wanted to get involved in a few of the traditions of the University. One of these traditions was the annual Bookstore Basketball tournament. The problem was I have NO basketball skill. My basketball career has been highlighted by my annual injuring of Fumai (I rock) and the one day I owned Ben Herrig (He never received love as a child) by making 3 shots over him in one game and the non fight he wanted to start. Eye! (My previous high point total was one) Anyways, I decided that I could best serve bookstore basketball as a joke team, since I could pretend that the people were laughing because I was funny, not bad. My concept was simple - replace the sport I sucked at with the one that was a part of me, hockey and injure my opponents to win by default. The Lone Ranger was born. So after signing up, fellow Vermin Pimpi, Bill Edwards, Ryan O'Leary and I headed to the JACC to pick up the brackets and team names. Edwards received his list first and started busting out laughing and saying something to the effect of buster or cizzut, or some other words used in combinations that usually left me confused. The Lone Ranger was to face Nothing But Trouble II, the sequal to the previous seasons bookstore champion NBT! Well, my odds of winning had dropped significantly, since the university would be pissed if I injured football players. I started my extensive training regiment of shooting with my stick at the Carroll court, playing video games, watching Putnins dance in bikini underwear (Argghhh!! MY EYES ARE BLEEDING!!!) and drinking alcoholic beverages.
I decided that making a fool of myself in front of a few people wasn't enough. I needed to make a fool out of myself in front of a crowd. Vermin Chris Lee was being interviewed by famed associate sports editor Tim Seymour and I decided to steal some of the limelight. After whining like a little bitch, I was able to grab a small blurb in The Observer. It is below:
Some people remain undaunted at the prospect of playing a seed. Paramount among them is sophomore (and hot stud) Mike Rieder, who playing alone as , yes, The Lone Ranger, has no fear of NBT2, his first round opponent."I'm guaranteeing victory, because I won't miss a shot," stated a confident Rieder, who will enlist the aid only of an inbounder, and plans to play in full hockey gear, complete with stick. "I won't play unless all five of them show up, because I want to give them a fair chance."
While such bravado is admirable for its naivete, most teams up against seeds realize that they face a quick exit.
You can see the obvious support that The Observer has in my abilities. I was ready for victory.
I woke up that day with a slight hangover, but none the less ready for victory. Unfortunately, Mother Nature had NBT covering the spread, so the bitch made it with the wind. The wind was so strong that any shots I took from the free throw line would fly over the backboard. So I resorted to shooting from half court. I did hit one beautiful warm-up shot and the crowd erupted.
The day was not to be mine. The foul weather conditions combined with ineptly poor officiating and a complete lack of inbounding skills from Putnins led to the early demise of the Lone Ranger. NBT did bring their best and eventually pulled out a squeaker with the 21-0 victory despite my shattering of the all-time blocks record. The game ended like a GLND/SMC kegger, with two sweaty men grappling and pulling each others shirts over their heads.
So the story of The Lone Ranger ends on a sad homoerotic note.
NDSportscenter:
The four student-athletes accused of raping a 20-year-old female student have been expelled by the University. A disciplinary hearing was held a couple of weeks ago. After deliberating, the University came to the decision to expel the students. The players names and photos were then made public in the newspaper. The former player was safety Justin Smith, 22. He had already graduated and was taking graduate courses. The three current players to be dismissed were safety Donald Dykes, 22; safety Abram Elam, 20; and wide receiver Lorenzo Crawford, 19. Dykes was vying for a 5th year on the team and was two weeks away from graduating. Crawford and Elam were about to finish their sophomore years. According to one attoreny they were expelled for sexual misconduct. No criminal charges have been filed. The local prosecutor is expected to decide by May 15th whether the case merits criminal charges based on the evidence and information gathered.
After the Fall sporting events we were 14th in the Sears' Directors Cup. The Winter schedule has been kind to us as we rank 6th for that season. Stanford is in first with what is basically an insurmountable lead.
Five other Domers will have a chance to make an NFL roster. Despite not being drafted, five players were signed as free agents. Safety Ron Israel was snapped up by the Washington Redskins. The Buffalo Bills will be giving defensive end Grant Irons a shot. The Colts and Packers showed interest in offensive tackle Kurt Vollers adn running back Tony Fisher, respectively. And the Cincinnati Bengals sought a fullback and went after Jason Murray.
The men's golf team finished second in the Big East. They lost to Virginia Tech by 17 strokes. Senior Steve Ratay and freshman Ryan Marshall were selected to the All Big East Team.
Campus News:
The campus news has been quite volatile lately. Time for some lighter fare.
Senior Tom Keeley was named one of the ten finalists for the Charles Schulz College Cartoonist Award. Tom brought levity to The Observer with his comic strip "Fourth and Inches." The award, named after the famed "Peanuts" creator, is the most prestigious honor that a collegiate cartoonist can receive. The daily strip was a finalist despite not having a running storyline, no regular characters, and no political insights or perspectives. The whole 'toon focused on ND events and people from campus. Keeley has been entertaining Domers for the last three years. He came to be the paper's cartoonist after responding to an advertisement in The Observer at the end of his freshman year. Tom put in two or three hours a night, five nights a week to help give the students the opportunity to take things a little less seriously. Quite the dedication for a computer engineer. When experiencing cartoonist's-block, Tom could always fall back on some certainties: "...with business majors and dining hall food you really can't go wrong." Keeley has no immediate plans to, say, work at Cartoon Network, but he hasn't ruled out giving syndicated cartooning a shot. A book entitled "The Best of Fourth and Inches" featured three years of greatest laughs and was available to students.
Campus Watch by the Gipper from Scholastic:
A Breen-Phillips resident, characteristically eager to put things down her pants, smuggled a bottle of gin from Fisher Hall in her corduroys last weekend, according to a tipster of high repute. That isn't the funny part, although you could have been forgiven for thinking it was, had you seen her sauntering down South Quad with a foot-long bulge down one leg. The funny part is that she decided to set up shop in front of the Fr. Sorin statue on God Quad, offering shots of the previously pants-ed punch to passers-by for 25 cents apiece. She stood out there for over an hour and - surprisingly - made few sales. The aspiring bartendress later sold the remainder of the bottle to an unnamed woman at Denny's. When hard liquor is gone, how will the university continue to encourage such entrepreneurship?
Hall Notes:
More old school history courtesy of I.I. Probst '26...
In the '20s Carroll had a population of about 70 to 75 students. The freshman class as a whole had roughly 350 to 375 pupils. Total enrollment at ND hovered around 1350 to 1400.
You may have noticed "(St Edward)" written on the 3rd floor blueprint and "(St Aloysius)" on the plan of the 4th floor. Mr. Probst could not recall exactly what these pertained to in the Main Building. He remembered dormitory life, though. Bedrooms (if you could call them that) consisted on a cot and a four-drawer wooden cabinet per student. Personal items were kept in the "trunk room." This was basically everyone's closet. Belongings were kept there and visited maybe once a week. So if someone needed something they stocked up a week at a time.
Finally, according to Mr. Probst, it was believed that Carroll stopped being in the Main Building around World War II. Still some history to be uncovered. More this summer, hopefully.
NDSportscenter:
The Bookstore Final Four took place last weekend. Up until the semi- finals, the refereed rounds had experienced near perfect weather for outdoor basketball. Twas chilly, but rain and wind were non-existant. The top 3 teams to start the tourney made the Final Four. The #7 team was re-ranked to #4 after re-seeding before the Sweet 16. So the top 4 teams made it as far as predicted. All were lacking varsity basketball players. In fact David Graves went down with an ankle injury as his team fell early.
#2 Adworks (sponsored by an advertising company) played #3 Project Mayhem. Adworks featured Vermin Carlyle Holiday, linebacker Justin Tuck, and safety Abe Elam. They fell behind early, 6-3. Project Mayhem was hitting from the outside despite intensely cold rain and unforgiving winds. Mayhem had the best point guard-shooting guard combo I've seen in nine years of watching games. The point guard, Luke Mueller, was hands-down the best point guard to hit those asphalt courts. Unfortunately the weather caught up with Mayhem. Adworks went on a 10-1 run as their size took over. They came out on top, 21-16.
#1 black JACKS took on #4 Lazy Boys in the other semi-final. Lazy Boys were a scrappy squad that had been winning close games dating back to last year's tourney. They had quality chemistry but the weather limited their outside game. JACKS size led them to a 21-13 victory.
The worst Bookstore weather in recent history continued for the Finals. No rain was present but the winds were highly forceful and the cold was nearly unbearable for the ungloved participants. Adworks size was dominant early. They jumped to an 11-5 halftime lead. JACKS backcourt, who had really carried them throughout the tourney, was shut out in the first half. Carlyle is a star on offense on the football field and a blanket on defense on the basketball court. He held last year's MVP scoreless the entire game. By the way, the pom pon squad performed at halftime in tank tops. As cold as it was, that had to be some sort of du Lac violation. The second half saw JACKS get the deficit down to 4. But Adworks went on a 5-0 highlighted by a breakaway dunk by Tuck. the lead grew to 10 at one point before a final score of 21-12. Tuck was named MVP. Despite being shut out, Al Vitter was named Mr. Bookstore.
All in all, the tourney was respectable. Thankfully it was not as violent as last year. The crowds were decent considering the weather. Adworks is a formidable champion, as all their players contributed on offense and defense in the final. However, they still do not measure up to the champions from the mid-'90s. The crown still belongs to '94 champ NBT.
The 73rd Blue-Gold Game was very uneventful. The rain began as the game kicked off. Thank goodness Tyrone used a running clock that only stopped in the final two minutes of each half. The final score was 3-0. The teams were evenly divided talent-wise. The game lasted a mere 82 minutes, including a 20 minute halftime. 17,025 spectators saw 20% of the offense, according to Coach Willingham. LoVecchio threw 3 picks. Arnaz grabbed 5 balls for 73 yards. The offensive MVP was running back Ryan Grant who gained 45 yards on 7 carries. Gerome Sapp had 5 tackles and 1 interception to nab defensive MVP honors. The only real news to come out of spring ball was that Jared Clark is no longer competing to be the quarterback. He has switched to tight end and is quite pleased.
You should have received your ticket application by now. Shocked at the sticker price? You should be. Prices were jacked up $5 per ticket and the service charge ballooned from $5 to $15.
Campus News:
Led by the new student body president, a petition was available for undergraduates to sign that called for a reverse of the SYR ban and to allow more student voice in campus decision-making. However it doesn't really seem like a radical, authority-fighting move by the students. The student body president and vice president actually had to get PERMISSION from Student Activities officials to sponsor the petition. What rebellion! The petition was distributed to all 27 dorms and some off-campus locations. The petition demands three things....
A) Father Mark Poorman, V.P. for Student Affairs, repeal his own decision to ban in-hall dances
2) The University use educational initiatives instead of imposing restrictions to address alcohol abuse among students
d) Officials promise undergraduates direct input in student life policy-making
The petition stated how students felt banning SYRs would damage residential life and that the alcohol policy changes are not the best way to address abusive drinking because they do not attack the root of the problem.
Well, as of that following Monday night, 4063 undergraduates had signed the petition. The signatures were collected in just three days and even included email confirmations from students studying abroad. The signatures and an explanation of the petition were later forwarded to University officers.
Campus Watch by the Gipper from Scholastic:
Before getting into the regular tip, the Gipper would like to respond to a most peculiar e-mail he received from Denmark. This is not made up. It went:
"Hi Mister Gipper;)
I tried to find a page on how to pronounce "Sheik" and your page was goggle's first hit. It stroke me that my favorite band's name, "Eaten by Sheiks" was often pronounced "sheeks" instead of "shakes" as I knew to be correct and is stated on your page as well. Looking further I found http://www.bartleby.com/68/35/5435.html where they say "sheek" is the American pronounciation, "shake" rather Brithish, wheras the latter is spelled "sheikh."
Regard
Ralf"
Thanks for the tip, Ralf, it was truly stroking.
Hall Notes:
Last week we posted old school blueprints of the old school. Here's s'more background on Carroll in the '20s....
While in the Main Building, Carroll was purely a freshmen dorm. Brownson was another freshmen dorm that existed on the east side of the Domer. Carroll covered parts of four floors. Three of them are posted. Below all these floors was Carroll's bathroom. Sort of. I guess it could be described as a bathroom. Each student had a wash bowl and medicine cabinet. Privacy was at a minimum and so were showers, as they only occured roughly once a week. The Carroll Study Hall took up the whole west wing. It contained about 70 desks and was pretty much the hangout (not unlike Beverly Hills 90210's "Peach Pit" if I remember correctly).
More next week.
NDSportscenter:
Bookstore XXXI fielded 528 teams this year, down from 580 teams last year. (The largest tournament had more than 700 teams back a few years.) Roughly 40 teams were vying for the 32 ranked positions. The tournament was as deep as any in recent history. The #1 squad, black J.A.C.K.S., consists of basically an All-Bookstore team. Two players are from last year's champ (MVP Al Vitter and linebacker Courtney Watson), one player is a former walk-on (John Hiltz) who made the finals in '99 and was 2nd Team All-Bookstore last year, one was 1st Team All-Bookstore last year (Kevin Muempfer), and the fifth (Sean McCarthy) was 3rd Team All-Bookstore. This team was considered to be possibly the most stacked team in Bookstore history. (Personally, I don't think so. They look good on paper but really don't come close to comparing to DOS KLOSKAS, NBT, or other top teams from the early to mid-'90s.)
The #2 team, Adworks All-Stars, has Vermin Carlyle Holiday and two other football players (Abe Elam and Justin Tuck). The other two players were All-Bookstore last year. #3 Project Mayhem very well could win the whole thing. They have the best chemistry and a point guard who played Division I ball at Eastern Illinois. He's without a doubt the best point guard I've seen in 9 years of watching games. Mayhem returns four players from their Elite Eight team. I believe one of the other players was All State in Indiana in high school. (Jimmy Chitwood?) The #6 team has varsity basketball player Charles Thomas. David Graves joined the #19 team. Coach Mike Brey joined the fray for Stylistics. Harold Swanagan appears to be sitting out.
Some new rules went into effect for Bookstore this year. A team may carry no more than 3 players who have suited up for a Division II or III college in the past 15 years. Any team with a player who suited up for a Division I college in the last 15 years may not carry more than one Division II or III player. Division II and III players are now classified the same way as football players.
Bookstore also made a change with the money generated from participation fees. Any money left over after paying for officials, set-up fees, and trophies will be donated to the Jumpball program. Jumpball is a basketball clinic for underprivileged children in Jamaica run by the Notre Dame Club of Jamaica. More money will be going to the program thanks to donations from PJ Marketing, Adidas, and the Hammes Bookstore.
Unlike past years, The Observer coverage of Bookstore has been pretty good so far. We've posted a few articles that tell of the Bookstore game antics. Hilarious. We also posted an article telling of the censoring of names. Some administators don't have a very good sense of humor and they have felt the need to not let anyone say anything. First SYRs, now freedom of humor. Place is becoming a giant day care center. I suspect next week students will have to raise their hands to ask to use the lavatory. Anyway, read and enjoy the articles.
Oh, by the way, the "censoring" article got censored by the University. Follow that? I copied-and-pasted the article on the day it was posted on-line. Well, when I went back to look it up in the "Past Issues" it had mysteriously disappeared. The weaselly censors are out in full force.
News on the Blue-Gold Game and the Bookstore Final Four next week.
Six Domers went in the NFL Draft. Only Vermin Anthony Weaver went on day one:
Vermin Weaver - Baltimore Ravens, 2nd round, #52 overall
Rocky Boiman - Tennessee Titans, 4th round, #133 overall
Vermin John Owens - Detroit Lions, 5th round, #138 overall
Tyreo Harrison - Philadelphia Eagles, 6th round, #198 overall
Javin Hunter - Baltimore Ravens, 6th round, #206 overall
David Givens - New England Patriots, 7th round, #253 overall
Undrafted: Ron Israel, Grant Irons, Tony Fisher, and Kurt Vollers
Campus News:
Looks like Coach Willingham has first first scandal to deal with. One former football player and three current players have been accused of rape by a twenty-year old student. No names have been released. The woman had been at a bar and met the four men. She had previously known them and decided to accompany them to a party they said they were going to attend. When she arrived there was no party. She said she tried to scream and fight them off but they were too strong. Afterward one of them drove her back to campus. That's the story that was released to the papers. She waited five days before going to the hospital and nine days before filing a report with the police. She also sought a disciplinary hearing with the University. She says she was not intoxicated at the time. She had had only three drinks at the bar, with the last one coming 90 minutes before she left with the men. The police sought to question the four men named by the accused. One was questioned and the other three decided to go the attorney route. Coach Willingham has deferred to the police and the University to handle all matters. No players have been suspended from practice as of yet.
The incident took place on March 28th. There is no evidence to indicate a date rape drug or heavy consumption of alcohol was involved. The house was searched and evidence gathered by police. All four men are current students.
We have also posted four final Letters to the Editor concerning the whole ending of SYRs/alcohol policy change issue.
Campus Watch by the Gipper from Scholastic:
Now the Gipper would like to share a bit of advice with future tipsters. Over the last couple of weeks, a young woman has been keeping the Gipp posted on the budding romance between her friend and a Golden Dragon delivery boy. The story started out all right: Following a February 14 delivery he received a big red Valentine from his admirer, and she invited him to a party the next weekend. Unfortunately, this isn't a tip. After the party, the Gipp received another update, labeled "Hot Tip....Part 2." Hoping for something better, the Gipper dove right in; but he was again disappointed. The tipster reported: "Gipper, the party which I alluded to in my last email took place last evening and can be described in one word: comedy. Our friend...showed up after midnight and seemed ill-at-ease at first. When asked which he preferred, China or America, he said, 'America...freedom.' My friend whispered in my ear 'Freedom? He works 12 hours a day, 7 days a week....what kind of freedom is that?' He failed to get jiggy, because he was driving later, and confessed that this was his first Notre Dame party. (Imagine that!) The cops broke up the gathering at 2:00 am. We assume he believes that this is how a normal party ends....Again, this stuff is too good to keep in the dark." Sorry, ladies. Still not a tip.
Hall Notes:
Back in the day, Carroll Hall was in the Main Building. It occupied the west side of the Building and encompassed at least three floors. Thanks to I.I. Probst '26 we have some blueprints of the Main Building from the '20s. (We have posted three of these prints on the Carroll Hall History page under a 1920s link called "The Main Building.") The second floor is most likely the one we know at the top of the front steps. (If you have a difficult time making out the text on the prints simply read our captions. That should clear things up.) The photocopies I was sent were only of the 2nd and 3rd floors. However, part of the 4th floor was visible on the photocopy of the 2nd floor. (That portion has been posted.) More next week.
NDSportscenter:
Well, let's get right into it. Bookstore team names. I never agree with the students Top Ten list so I make my own, but I break them down into categories....
Longest Name:
On What Day Did God Create Our Bookstore Team And Couldn't He Have Rested on That Day As Well?
The Golden Era - The '80s:
6) The Punky Brusters
5) "Strike First, Strike Hard, No Mercy Sir!" ("Karate Kid" quote)
4) Jimmy Chitwood's 2nd Cousin's Once Removed ("Hoosiers" homage)
3) The Alex P. Keaton Express
2) Once Again it's on Like Donkey Kong
1) 6'5", 6'9" with the Afro (Team Fletch?)
Chick Teams (I think. If not....well...I don't wanna know.):
3) We Wish Our Parents Gave Us Balls to Play With
2) We Play With Plastic, Not Wood
1) The Only Thing We Stuff is our Bras
Currents events, ranging from sports to war:
3) Duke Has Only One Boozer, We Have 4.5
2) Carlos Boozer Does Look Like A Dog
1) Donald Rumsfeld And His Roving Band of Peace-Love Flower Children
Just Plain Funny:
2) NBA: Never Been Ahead
1) Vertically Challenged, Horizontally Blessed
Just Plain Odd:
8) Oh Those Donuts
7) Hot Karl Killed My Kitten
6) "Can't Sleep....The Clown'll Eat Me."
5) 17 Ways to eat Mashed Potatoes
4) We Don't Think You're Ready For This Jelly
3) Half-man, Half-biscuit
2) Totally Sweet Mammals
1) Good Bowel Movement
ND Related names:
7) No Sex, No Alcohol, No Fun
6) The Poor Man's Jaccuzzi-Eat at NDH, Get in Bathtub, Relax And Let 'Er
Rip!
5) Chris Webber, Bob Davie, and 3 Other Guys Who Don't Know When to Call
Timeout
4) Finnegans, Dolly Parton, and 3 Other Huge Busts
3) Out Faster Than George O'Leary
2) 1 guy pissed about SYRs and 4 guys who wouldn't have had dates anyway
1) We Suck so Bad, It Violates DuLac
Everyone's Favorite Topic: Innuendo
11) We may shoot it a lot but we never go down
10) Britney Spears, Christina Aguilera, Jessica Simpson, & 2 Other Virgins
9) Shaved
8) The Doublefisters
7) Adult Bookstore Team
6) Baller, I Just Met Her!
5) 5 Guys That Make Ron Jeremy Cry
4) Double Pump + Shoot...The Climatic Return
3) 5 Doors With Huge Knobs Waiting To Be Polished
2) Shooting For The Sweet 16 With Mary Kate & Ashley Olsen
1) We Just Want to Put the Tip In
Let's close with 3 classic insult-team names...
3) Hold My Drink While I Kiss Your Girlfriend
2) You Mom Called, She Misses Me
1) You Were Your Father's Fastest Swimmer
Campus News:
Tuition is going to go up again. No surprise there. Last year's rise was the lowest in 40 years (percentage wise) at 4.9%. The new percentage rise will also be 4.9. Average costs will be up to $32,020 for the 2002-03 academic year. The 4.9% rise equals $1,490. Tuition will be at $25,510 and board will be at $6,510. Officials said the tuition hike was primarily due to growing expenses and a slowing economy. An example of an additional expense will be the Center for Performing Arts. Donations paid for the construction, but the University will have to staff and maintain the Center. (Not quite sure why the University gave this as example for a reason to jack up tuition seeing as how the Center won't even open until late summer/early fall of 2003 at the earliest.)
Tuition and fee revenue make up about 55% of the total budget, so students basically pay 55% of the actual cost. The other 45% comes from the bookstore, athletics, and endowment earnings. The endowment is valued at approximately $3 billion. Most is donated for a specific purpose and cannot be used to defray tuition costs. Only roughly 10% may be used freely.
Monk sent a letter to the parents of all undergraduates stating this 4.9% increase is less than other private institutions who passed the 5% mark. The University will be limiting salary increases and budget additions. Inflation is usually 2 to 3%, but the University spokesman called that an inaccurate comparion: "We have to consider atypical expenses like salaries, new equipment, books, technology, competing for the best professors and facilities which are built through alumni donations but whose operating expeneses are not covered by the gifts and then become part of the budget."
Other increases: Graduate school up 4.6% to $25,410; MBA Program and Law School up 4.8% to $26,110.
We've posted more articles and Letters to the Editor on the cancelling of SYRs.
Campus Watch by the Gipper from Scholastic:
Over JPW, a Zahm resident was ambling back to his dorm at about 1:30 am when he noticed a girl trying to hoist herself into a first-floor window. When questioned, she explained that the doorknob of the room she was trying to enter had broken, and that this was her only possibly means of entry. (These tips get weirder every week.) So the young Zahmbie helped her up, and went in to tell some of his RA buddies about the peculiar situation. So the RAs investigated, and sure enough, the handle had come off the young gent's door. "Can you get out?" they called in. The fellow answered no, so they began prying the door open. Then it dawned on the RAs that the door was dead-bolted from the inside. They persisted, and the captive young man finally opened up, his face flushed and his drapes flapping in the wind. The RAs were confused. "You know that parietals aren't until two this morning, don't you?" they asked him. At this, the lad cursed loudly, and the RAs ran to his window and called out, "Come back! You still have ten minutes!" Those kidders.
Hall Notes:
We're goin' way back this week. So old school it's ancient school. Twas a few Notre Dame Magazines ago that I was flipping through the year columns in the back. For some reason I was compelled to read the very first column that covered the graduating years of '22 through '26. It seems the column writer, I.I. Probst, happened to mention he was a freshman in Carroll Hall. That would be the Fall of 1922. Dammmmmmnnnn. Dude was in school when the Four Horseman rode to glory. Sweet. Anyway, I wrote the fellow in hopes of gaining some knowledge on the early days of Carroll Hall to share with y'all. Mr. Probst was very helpful. He even gave a call. The just-turned 97-year-old talked for almost half an hour. I scrawled down notes like a madman. He also mailed some blueprints from back in the day. However, this week is but a tease. Some Carroll Hall history for ya next week. (Just call me the Farmer, 'cause I'm gonna milk it.)
NDSportscenter:
Basketball news: Freshman-to-be Torin Francis recently competed in the McDonald's High School All-American game. Torin scored 7 points for the West as they defeated the East 138 to 107. Francis also received the Morgan Wootten Award as the McDonald's National High School Player of the Year. Yeah, that's right, we got the National High School Player of the Year. Phat. Torin's senior season had him scoring 29 ppg, grabbing 12 rpg, and making 5 bpg. The 6'10" forward/center can also step back and shoot the 3 like Kevin Garnett. ESPN showed the game and had a halftime segment dedicated to Torin . The highly articulate ball player carries a 3.67 GPA while being the vice president of the senior class. He is also the sports editor for the school paper and is on the student council. Another amazing fact is that he has only been playing basketball for a little over four years. Hopefully he'll keep playing for four more for the Irish....Chris Thomas was named to the Sporting News All-Freshman Team....At the year-ending basketball banquet Ryan Humphrey was given the ND National Monogram Club MVP Award. Senior walk-on Charles Thomas (who was given a scholarship this year) won the ND Club of St. Joseph Valley Rockne Student-Athlete Award....Humphrey competed in the 14th annual Slam Dunk content. Ryan was one of eight college ballers with made rise to be invited. Unfortunately Ryan didn't fare well, placing near the bottom. David Graves was one of seven to shoot the rock in the 3-Point Championship. He was also bounced out of the competition early.
The baseball team is hurting. Literally. The pre-season #4 has been decimated by injuries. They are currently third in the Big East. The worst injury was to freshman shortstop Matt Macri. He was so good coming out of high school that he was a first or second round MLB prospect. And now he's done for the year after having "Tommy John" elbow surgery. "Tommy John" surgery for a shortstop? Yip. He apparently was a pitcher in high school (and a quarterback). Well, his high school pitching coach was far from good. Matt came in with a worn out arm and now he's done for the year. Hopefully he'll get a medical red-shirt.
Bookstore has started. I hope to give you a team name rundown next week.
Campus News:
Father Poorman is not backing down on his latest policy changes. A few days after he made them known in a campus-wide email, he went before the Campus Life Council to officially propose them. A couple hundred students attended the meeting that had been moved to the LaFortune Ballroom. A few students were given permission to ask questions. A vote was taken by closed ballot and the count was 11 for (overturning the ban on in-hall dances) and 7 against. However, they really don't call the shots, as we all know. No doubt the top administrative dogs and the Board of Trustees will make the final call.
The main reason Poorman is shooting for these changes is student safety. Apparently there have been 17 instances this year of students being rushed to the hospital because of drinking-related injuries. Also "binge" drinking is still high and roughly a third of students supposedly have missed class because of alcohol recovery. (Not really sure where they got that info.) Students have asked to see the actual study documentation that produced all the stated conclusions. No dice, though, on seeing that information.
Another rally took place. This one was impromptu and not headed by student government leaders. Twas a midnight gathering of maybe one hundred Domers. Well things got a tad out of hand. Liquor bottles were reportedly hurled at the Main Building. Security came to the scene and everyone bailed. Just another day on in the Middle West.
More articles and Letters to the Editor have been posted.
Campus Watch by the Gipper from Scholastic:
One of the great pleasures of being the Gipper is trying to decipher the convoluted tips that people send in about their drunken exploits while they're still drunk. This next one meanders pretty badly, but the Gipp thinks it goes something like this:
A young dude gets drunk (oh my!) at Heartland last weekend and somehow finds his way into the establishment's kitchen, where all the liquor is stored. He resolves to leave before he is caught, but on his way out he begins fumbling around with a cash register. As expected, a bouncer shows up and promptly ejects him. Undeterred, the dopey fellow finds a friend and returns, hoping to snag some of the booze. He grabs a box of wine and sets back out for the door, but once again his impaired attention span gets the best of him, and he starts playing with a stove burner. Can you see where this is going? The event culminated in a blazing kitchen rag, a poorly controlled fire extinguisher and - you guessed it - the angry bouncer. How did our compadre extract himself from this mess? A $200 bribe, of course.
Hall Notes:
Slimmer '98 found this posting on an ND message board. Usually the talk is ND sports, but sometimes non-Domers ask about campus life. Here is a response by a Domer telling about why he chose ND over all others:
"I went to Notre Dame, and it changed my life forever. To give you some background, I am an Army Brat, and I went to 5 different high schools in 4 years. Because of the frequent moves, I didn't really have a place that I called "home", and I didn't have a strong group of friends at any of my high schools. As a result, I wanted to go to a university that I could call home...
...Of course, the decision was simple. Since I had visited both schools, I didn't even hesitate when he asked me where I wanted to go. Auburn has almost 25,000 students spread all over town. The Greek system is the most important thing they've got. And while it looked like a fun school, I didn't leave feeling like I had to go there. My visit to ND, however, was incredible. I visited in early February, when snow still covered the campus. My host was a freshman in Carroll Hall (those of you familiar with ND's campus knows that this dorm is INCREDIBLY FAR FROM EVERYTHING). As soon as I got there, a terrible storm hit campus. The situation had all of the ingredients for disaster...
...But I finally made it to Carroll Hall. I met my host and his roommates. Four guys lived in that room, which was pretty small and didn't have many of the comforts that students at Auburn had. But they all loved the place. They were all extremely nice to me and took care of any needs that I had. Then we went across the hall to see the neighbors. Same deal--the guys spent time talking to me and telling me about the place. The entire hallway was like that, and I was sold. I went to the dining hall with them, they showed me around campus, they took me to play basketball with them, and we partied a little. What I had found, really, was a home, which I had never before had. I envisioned a place that would produce great friends, great times, and great memories. Those guys at Carroll Hall made all of the difference in the world. Thank God for them!"
NDSportscenter:
The men's fencing team finished the regular season #1. It was the 18th undefeated season in school history. Their unbeaten streak ran to 59 matches. The women finished 20-2 with a #3 ranking. However the team failed to capture the National Championship. They came in third behind St. John's and Penn State. The Irish sent the maximum number of fencers allowed and even scored the highest point total in school history. Ten fencers earned All-American honors. Junior Jan Viviani received 2nd team All-American honors and now has a career record of 1118-14 for a 89.4 winning percentage. This was the final season for the fencing coach. No word on his replacement just yet.
Basketball notes: Chris Thomas was named the national freshman of the year by Basketball Times Magazine. Thomas was picked over Dajuan Wagner of Memphis who may jump to the pros after only one year in college. Thomas had these numbers to finish out the year: 15.6ppg, 7.64apg, 21.8spg, 3.5rpg, 38% FG, 36% 3-point FG, 88% FT....Ryan Humphrey's stock has really climbed. He is now being projected as a late first roun/mid-second round pick in the NBA Draft....Coach Brey has 5 scholarships to dole out.
Spring ball started this weekend. There will be fifteen practices before the April 27th Blue-Gold Game. And just in time for spring ball Coach Willingham named a new linebackers coach. Bob Simmons has quite the resume. He was the head coach at Oklahoma State from '95 to '00. Prior to that he was an assistant for 19 years at Colorado, West Virginia, and Toledo. He took over an Oklahoma State program that had endured six straight losing seasons and had lost 18 consecutive conference games. In 1997, en route to a top 12 ranking, the Cowboys defeated Texas and Colorado. Simmons was named the 1997 Big 12 Coach of the Year.