Campus News:
The new additions around the reflecting pool are complete. A new granite-clad concrete seating wall surrounds the pool. The anonymous $8 million project was constructed to honor all the endowed professorships. The names of the endowed chairs have been etched in the granite. Currently 125 names (from the '60s through the '90s) line the wall. The east wall is presently blank and awaiting 45 more names courtesy of the "Generations" campaign. Pictures will be provided in the future.
In a spring issue of Scholastic the declining number of engineering students was highlighted. Title "School of Hard Knocks," the piece stated..."While the number of undergraduate students at Notre Dame has steadily increased over the past 15 years, the number of engineers is on the decline." In 1986 there were 1,119 engineers. Six years later the number was down to 806. An all-time low occurred in '98 with 627. The piece concluded..."At this pace, the University should be rid of the school alltogether by 2018. Has hard work and dedication gone out of style?"
Campus Watch by the Gipper from Scholastic:
Everybody knows that North Dining Hall Lady, Elizabeth, right? She's the one who always greets you by name as she swipes your ID card. Well, here's further proof to the Gipp's theory that Elizabeth is the cutest girl on campus - a couple of Keenan guys covered their names on their ID cards with authentic-looking nicknames. As Ms. Elizabeth swiped their cards through, she said, "Hello, Sharptooth! Well, hi there, Snake."
Hall Notes:
Before introducing some old school Carroll history, we have some final information from Vermin Bill Becher '84. Check this out....Back in the day ALL parties had open bars. None of the "behind closed doors" business. Alcohol consumption was completely unregulared. Freshman could carry kegs across campus and not get in trouble. For further antics review "Animal House."
A small 5 inch by 8 inch Carroll knick-knack is on sale in the Bookstore. The wooden block has the facade of Carroll painted on one side. On the back is the following....
Carroll Hall was constructed in 1906. The building was first referred to as Dujarie and used as a seminary for the Brothers of Holy Cross. For a brief time in 1938, Blessed Brother Andre Bessate lived in this special building. In 1966 the Brothers sold the property to the University. The building's name was changed to Carroll Hall, and housed undergraduate students. Carroll Hall was named in honor of Charles Carroll, the cousin of Archbishop John Carroll. Charles was the only Catholic signer of the Declaration of Independence. The brick used for this structure was made from the marl deposits in St. Mary's Lake.
NDSportscenter:
The Irish track and field squad qualified nine for the 2000 NCAA Championships. Five of the nine walked away All-Americans. Marshaun West reached that status with a seventh place finish in the long jump. In doing so he became only the second Irish long jumper to be named All- American. Ryan Shay also finished seventh, but in the 10,000 meter race. For the year Shay was named an All-American in track and cross country. Jennifer Engelhardt ALSO came in seventh....in the high jump. She has also been a two time indoor high jump All-American. Tameisha King finishede ninth in the long jump. Look for her to be a repeat All-American as she is but a freshman. The fifth player awarded was Tim Kober, who placed tenth in the 800 meters. Prior to the NCAAs, the men's team won its first Big East title as they were paced by Ryan Shay's first place finishes in the 5,000 and 10,000 meters. The women's team placed third.
The softball team won its second consecutive Big East Championship. The Irish ended the regular season ranked 19th with a 46-12 overall record. The ladies went to a Region 8 tournament as a #3 seed. Only one victory followed in the round robin tourney. The second loss was in an upset by Central Michigan, 2 to 1.
Another article has been posted on Irish basketball recruit Chris Thomas.
Campus News:
Some odds and ends....
Father Hesburgh addressed the Holy Cross College Class of 2000 at the 33rd commencement. It's actually his first honorary degree from the college across the street. It only took 33 years to ask the Top Dog. Maybe that's why it's basically a two year community college. (Ouch. That was a bit harsh.)
In addition to the new Rolfs Sports RecCenter, another new exercise area opened in mid-January and in the JACC. The Raymond & Winifred Rirehart Faculty Exercise Facility is specifically for administrators and faculty. The room includes state-of-the-art equipment and 3 televisions with headphones. The men's and women's varsity basketball lockerrooms were also renovated and saunas were added in the JACC.
Well, last year's new football ticket distribution system bombed. Camping out was eliminated and the turnout for the new system consisted of 2 whole people. Now an even newer system will be attempted. Instead of four separate ticket distributions (frosh, soph, junior, and senior) there will be one event at Stepan that will include a pep rally with carnival and picnic. Former SUB manager Ross Kerr apparently believes it will be easy to start a new tradition and that it will be well received. He stated, "The so-called tradition of 'camping out' will soon be forgotten." Ummmmmm.....nothing "so-called" about it. And it won't be forgotten. Playin' themselves.
Campus Watch by the Gipper from Scholastic:
A business professor recently received a whopping $4000 to spend on one of those new-fangled flat computer screens, the kind that can be mounted on a wall. The Gipp thought you all should know this so that when you start setting up your summer jobs, you can think about where your hard earned tuition money is going.
Hall Notes:
Not only did we get the D.L. on Vermin Bill Becher '84, but we also became privy to some Carroll historical facts from the years 1980 through 1984.....
The "Vermin" nickname was used in the fall of 1980. Knowledge of it being used prior to that is unknown according to the '84 grad.
From '80-'84 the Haunted House was not in existence.
The basement area was basically unused and described as narrow "catacomb- like passageways.
In the early '80s the rest of the campus knew one thing about Carroll... Friday afternoon "happy hours" that served to launch the weekend's parties.
The last note is very interesting. Bill stated, "In '80-'81 (and before, obviously) we had a very large and very wide stairway (with heavy wood banisters, etc.) that ran up to all floors through the center of Carroll, right where the front door is. It was a popular place to hang out, drink, or study. Whenwe returned for the '81-'82 year, it had been removed and replaced with rooms, leaving only the very narrow side stairway."
Good stuff, Bill! More facts on "The History of Carroll" next week.
NDSportscenter:
We have already had a high school senior-to-be commit to play football for the Irish. The first member of the Class of '01 is Mark LeVoir, a 6'7", 297 lb. TE/OL out of Eden Prairie, Minnesota. He is ranked in Tom Lemming's top 100 and had been an ND fan for 7 years before verbally committing after the Blue-Gold game. LeVoir carries a 3.5 GPA, but has yet to take the ACT. We won out over Minnesota, Florida State, Colorado, Michigan, and Northwestern.
The women's tennis team made some noise in the post season. They were 23-6 after beating Illinois-Chicago and South Carolina 5-0 and 5-1 in the first two rounds of the NCAA tournament, respectively. It had been awhile since they had advanced to the Sweet 16. However that achievement was short-lived as # Florida laid the smackdown and sent the Irish packing, 5-0. The women had come in second in the Big East to Miami.
Men's lacrosse was also representin' in the playoffs. Our boys went in as the #12 seed and took down #5 Loyola, 15-13. It became ND's second win in 9 appearances in the NCAA tourney. That run was halted, though, as #4 Johns Hopkins took us down.
Campus News:
After 8 years of operating in the red, ND Video has closed up shop. No word yet on what will now occupy the vacant area. A tanning salon has been mentioned, as has a knick-knack shop for such things as SYR gifts.
It was reported awhile ago that the Graffiti Dance has been permanently cancelled. In place of it will be a video dance party. Another Freshmen Orientation item has been addressed. New restrictions will limit the hours available for opposite-sex dorm activities while eliminating some activities such as the "tuck-in." Apparently this was an activity during which male freshmen visit women's dorms at bedtime, read a story, and "tuck" the women in. Supposedly this was alarming some students. (Hell, it's alarming to this alum! Why didn't I get to do that?!?!)
Campus Watch by the Gipper from Scholastic:
All right, kiddies, the Gipp is thinking of a word that he can't say in his column. It's like "fire truck" without the "ire tr" or "icing the puck" with an "f" in place of "icing the p." Get it? Whenever the Gipp wants to say that magic word, he's going to say "fluff" instead. It's a Friday night so a bunch of good Catholic kids get together to cook up some burgers and brats for a "Fluff Lent" party. The Gipp thinks that the "Fluff Lent" party is funny in itself, but the tip here is that a Notre Dame man at the party left the shindig with a young hairstylist from town and another guy, who is also said to be from Notre Dame. The second young man suggested that the three of them engage in a little hanky-panky, but the first young man recoiled from the offer. Apparently, he had already been in one of those two-guys-and-one-girl situations a few weeks before, and it was a little weird. Now, eating some meat is one thing, but a menage-a-trois on a Friday in Lent? For chrissakes, doesn't anyone give a fluff about Jesus anymore?
Hall Notes:
Got word on another veteran Vermin who recently joined the ranks of the website registry. DJ Murphy '90 was kind enough to throw us a bone when I asked of his legacy since his days in The Hotel. This is a classic Vermin resume. To dream and to achieve. The following is what heroes are made of......
I came home (Boston area) after graduation and immediately embarked on my first career of avoiding a career by moving to Cape Cod for the summer. For the next five years I kicked around from job to bad job. I worked on two political campaigns (same candidate, two different offices, two losses), I was a customer service rep for a company that sold copies to law firms called Knight Rider (enduring countless, yet deserved, David Hasselhoff and Kitt jokes), I sold office equipment, I taught snot-nosed juniors in high school how to kick ass on their SATs and, of course, the old standby of lost souls, I waited on tables.
I had avoided graduate school until then because, if my checkered academic career in South Bend was any indication, any more money spent in the pursuit of education would be like pissing into the wind. However, after hearing for years from my mother that no one was ever going to pay me to watch TV, I decided that she was wrong and, at 26 years old, was ready to enroll again in school. I went to Syracuse to study television production. If anybody thinks South Bend is cold and snowy I give them Syracuse, NY as colder and snowier. I graduated (with much less academic difficulty this time) and moved to NYC where I was editing highlights for a small cable station called NewSport. It was along the lines of ESPNEWS except viewed by about 1/1000th as many people. Perhaps not surprisingly, NewSport didn't last very long as a viable concern so I was quickly looking for a job again.
I was in kick around mode again (but kicking around in television which was better) I had freelance gigs with NBC, ABC and CBS before a Syracuse classmate called from ESPN and asked if I'd be interested in moving to Bristol. I told him he bet his sweet ass I would and I ended up in the programming department as a screener (lots of watching shows for timing, quality and content issues. In short doing the very same thing my mom told me no one would ever pay me for). I was content for about a year when I began to wonder if I was ever going to make ANY money (not much incentive for them to pay people here, there's always a few thousand kids just out of school who'll do the same job for less money). I was thinking of moving back to NY and was ready to take a job at MTV when ESPN.com came a-calling. I figured that in the long run internet was better than TV, plus they might actually let me write here. My job is mostly editing pieces about the miscellaneous sports (Outdoors, extreme, high school, etc). I write headlines, captions, synopses and such. Someday in the not too distant future I hope to be the beat editor for one of the major sports (college football would be nice but I'm not too picky there).
Other than that there isn't much news - no wife, no kids, no house, no dog. I'm not that grown up yet.
NDSportscenter:
The Irish baseball team almost pulled off another one for the ND sports record books. They fell 10-9 to Mississippi State in the NCAA tourney sub-regional. The Bulldogs came out on top after a solo homer in the bottom of the 9th. The Irish entered as the #3 seed in the sub-region of 4. They initially defeated #2 Tulane 8-4. That was followed by an 8-1 loss to #1 MSU. But the sub-regional is a round robin. The Irish again beat Tulane, 10-6. So they advanced to the final against MSU, who they needed to beat twice. ND came out strong and won the first game 7-0. Truthfully, the Irish should have won that second game, but an outfielder lost a ball in the lights. That error was the difference and it allowed MSU back in the game that they eventually won. This marked the first time since '94 that the Irish has won 2+ games in a sub-regional.
The baseball team's final record was 46 wins and 18 losses. The run they made seems even more unlikely after the Big East tourney. After taking 2nd in the Big East regular season, they lost twice to Boston College in the B.E. tourney round robin. However their regular season exploits proved strong enough to make the field of 64.
The biggest reason the Irish won 46 games was Big East Pitcher of the Year Aaron Heilman. He was the only unanimous choice for 1st team All Big East. Heilman pitched 8 complete games on the way to posting a 10-2 record. His ERA was 2.56 and he had 108 strikeouts, including an 18 K effort against West Virginia. For the third straight year Heilman was named All-American. He was one of six pitchers named FIRST team All-American this year. The Major League amateur draft took place on June 5th. Heilman was the 31st pick by the Minnesota Twins. He was the first of ten "sandwich" picks between the 1st and 2nd rounds to compensate teams who lost players to free agency. Heilman has one year of eligibility left and may come back. But I doubt it.
Campus News:
Yet again an issue was made of a tuition hike for next year. The tuition will climb 5.2% for the '00-'01 school year. This past year the price tage for tuition was $20,900. Apparently for fiscal '99, there was a $260 million increase in net assests. Supposedly the average budget surplus is well over $30 million per year. The students were wondering why tuition is so much, if that's the case. The surplus, according to the University, goes towards capital improvements, academic needs, and financial aid. The surplus most likely also goes toward the University's technological infrastructure, which is reportedly among the top 1% of colleges and universities. In '99, $27.8 million went toward need-based scholarship aid and $15.8 million was allocated for need-based student loans. Thirty nine percent of this most recent freshmen class was aided by the University in some way. Some help came from the $50 million NBC contract, which goes toward the general fund. We are the only major Division I university (that I know of) that puts all its money in a general university fund. For other schools, the money generated by athletics all goes right back into only the athletic department.
Campus Watch by the Gipper from Scholastic:
There's nothing like a Gipp tipper who stays faithful over the miles. According to a Gipp spy in Austria, there is an Indonesian man living in the dorm with our Innsbruck kids, and while the ND kids study the traditional Austrian fare, i.e. language and beer, he's researching Eastern teas and massage oils. On St. Patrick's Day, the masseuse man asked this Gipp tipper if he wanted to head back to his room for a massage. The tipper explains, "I was like, 'hell no.' and decided to sucker a business major and a bio major inot it!" Good man. The business major, being very drunk at the time, took the masseuse up on his offer. He was coerced into stripping down to his boxers and then given a full body massage. "This business major was completely scarred by the whole thing, and he smelt like massage oils for the rest of the night." Then the bio major took his turn. The Gipp will let the tipper finish this one up in his own words: "It started out the same way, but the bio kid's massage got a little uglier. The dude was like, 'You have a nice body, not like the business major who has a little chub.' That is what the crazy Indonesian man told him. After a little while, the guy asked him how big he was. Then the man asked him to stay the night." This is why the Gipp never leaves South Bend.
Hall Notes:
One of the newest additions to the website registry is a member of the Class of '84. Finally some old school Vermin! Bill Becher '84 floated some news our way after I inquired about some old stories and his current status. Here's the down low on a Vermin who graduated the same year I was getting my ass kicked in Space Invaders by my fellow grade schoolers.....
After the '84 graduation Bill moved back to Brownsburg, Indiana and joined the consulting arm of Arthur Andersen. In 1995 he became an Associate Partner in Andersen Consulting, which was part of the AA Worldwide Organization. Bill then left the AC "side of the house" in '98 and became a Partner in Arthur Andersen Business Consulting. This year he left AABC and became a Vice President at Powerway, a software company developing B2B Web-based solutions for manufacturing companies. Just this week it was announced that DaimlerChrysler (formerly just Chrysler) took an ownership stake in the company.
Bill still lives in that Indianapolis suburb and has 2 boys (or, as I like to call them..."future Vermin") with his Hometown Honey. The "future Vermin" even attend the same Catholic grade school their papa did. Bill also provided some historical Carroll notes which will be posted in the future.
NDSportscenter:
It seems that as quickly as last week's rumor circulated, is as quickly as it was shot down. For now. The University and Coughlin have denied everything. For now. We'll see how the year pans out. An article has been posted on the denials.
Coach Doherty has landed another top recruit, and this one's still in high school. Chris Thomas has just completed his junior year of high school right here in Indiana. A few weeks ago he verbally committed to us over Michigan State and Stanford. The 6'1", 165 lb. guard will sign a letter of intent in November. This past season Thomas averaged 24.3 ppg, 4.7 apg, 5.6 rpg, and 3.5 spg. This is our first hoosier since '92. He's ranked in the top 50 among juniors and can play the #1 or #2 guard. His forte is his shooting and he's been compared to All-American A.J. Guyton of Indiana. Coach D is making waves! Thomas was not even considering ND until Doherty started to put us back on the map. He made 3 unofficial visits and it was after the last one that he cancelled his trip to Stanford and gave us the affirmative. With this signing, it is expected that we will not get Ryan Walcott, a 6'2" point guard from Shadow Mountain High School in Phoenix and cousin of NBA player Mike Bibby. Martell Bailey of Chicago is also out of the picture because of grades. Two articles on the landing of Chris Thomas have been posted on the Articles of Interest page.
Late breaking news: Doherty also just landed ANOTHER top recruit - Jordan Cornette. An article we posted will tell you all you need to know.
The women's basketball team has also made further strides in recruiting. Two top 40 players - #26 Le'Tania Severe and #40 Janeka Joyce - have said they are coming to the Bend.
One last basketball note.....Remember a player by the name of Hans Rasmussen? He left the men's team in the middle of the '99 season. The center from Portland left because of homesickness. Now he's back. He was enrolled as a regular student last semester and is appealling to the NCAA to be eligible for first semester next year. It seems he'll have to be a walk-on, though, as all scholarships are apparently spoken for.
We also posted a new "article" that I received via email. It's actually an email that has been passing through the ND e-pipeline. It is MAJOR gossip and has to do with the head football coach. Go and read the article titled "Davie on the way out?"
Campus News:
Commencement took place today. The keynote speaker at the 155th annual event was Kofi Annan, the secretary-general of the United Nations.
More news from the most recent meeting of the Board of Trustees...
The Board elected Patrick F. McCartan of Cleveland as the new chair of the board. The 65-year-old is the managing partner of the international law firm Jones, Day, & Pogne. He has been a trustee since '89 and a Fellow of the University. McCartan received his bachelor's and law degree from ND.
The new kid on the block replaces Andrew J. McKenna, 70, of Winnetko, Illinois. The '51 grad had served as chair for the last eight years. He has been on the Board since '80 and shall remain as chair emeritus and a life trustee.
Campus Watch by the Gipper from Scholastic:
Making the most of being a national university, eight juniors in Keenan set some goals for themselves. They decided that they'd try to hook up with a girl from each state before graduation. So far they're up to 19 states. Not bad, but then comes along a group of nine BP women who have independently started their own national hook-up challenge, and they're already up to 30. Impressive. Both groups scored well in the midwest and mid-Atlantic states, but the girls' dominance in the plains led them to victory.
Hall Notes:
Another Vermin is about to kick bachelorhood to the curb. In December of 1998, Todd Kuczaj '98 popped the question. Well, the time is near. On June 24, 2000, Todd will get hitched to Jessica Acklin '98 in the Basilica. Those of you who were in school the same time as Kuczaj may remember her. Todd describes her as "the blond dining hall manager with lots of blond hair and a big-ass smile." Following the wedding will be a reception in the Monogram Room in the JACC. Then it's on to the U.S. Virgin Islands for the honeymoon. The final destination is Scottsdale, Arizona, where they have resided for the last two years. The soon-to-be- Mrs. works for Arthur Andersen. Todd just received his masters degree at Arizona State. The degree was in information management and he'll start in his occupation as an e-business consultant shortly. As for additional Vermin in the wedding.....Big Joe will represent Queens while Brian Buoye's raised out in Brooklyn.
NDSportscenter:
I just can't get enough of Bookstore. Here are some old school team names from previous tournaments....
Rinse Or I Won't Kiss You
She Said She Was 12, But She Was As Good As A 14 Year Old
Eat Crayons And Color The Charmin
Your Mother Does Deep Knee Bends In Cucumber Patches
Old Milwaukee and The Sunday Morning Odors
Bernie Goetz and The Subway Alumni
The Oyster Crew: Shuck Me, Suck Me, Eat Me Raw
One Guy, Another Guy, and Three Other Guys
The Ballheaded Freakdaddies
5 Ethiopians Hungry For A Win
Liberace Was Great On The Piano, But He Sucked On The Organ
Substantial Penalty For Early Withdrawal (a women's team)
Two Rosses Don't Make A Right
Guns And Rosses
Dribbling Uvulas
Nude Waterskiers for Christ
Four Guys Who Wonder Why Barney Rubble Never Got His Own Show And One Guy Who Swears He Saw It On Cable
I Phelta Thi
Wave Your Dick Addis
5 Schizophrenics and Us
4 Pencils and A Sharpener (a team of 4 guys and 1 girl)
You Can Call Us Anything You'd Like, But Don't Wave Your Dick Addis
The Digger Phelps Fan Club and Five Other Guys
The Good, The Bad, The Ugly, The Ugly, and The Ugly
P. E. Nisses (as in Pasquerilla East)
5 Guys who could score at will...until Bridget's closed down
Sorry if we shoot it all over you, but we don't like to dribble
Stop the bus and let my roommate, Jack, off
Junior Ryan Shay recently shattered the old school (literally "old school," in this case) record in the 10,000 m. He clocked in at 28 min 26.91 seconds. With that mark he moved up to a #2 collegiate ranking and qualified provisionally for the Olympic trials.
Ron Powlus is still playing ball. He's basically playing in the minors (World League in Europe) for the Philadelphia Eagles. Ron was the #2 quarterback but the starter went down with a broken hand. Powlus made his debut for the Amsterdam Generals in a 20-17 victory. He tossed 2 touchdown passes. I guess you could say he performed well in the red (zone) light district.
Campus News:
The Board of Trustees elected Monk, 59, to a new 5-year term as University president. He was 3 years into his third term so this really amounts to a 3 year contract extension.
The Board also replaced Beauchamp, 57, who had been executive vice president since 1987. He will become the executive vice president emeritus, continue as a member of the Fellows of the University, and still be a trustee. Beauchamp will continue to work directly with the president but his new duties are not clear. It is expected that he will be working more closely with University benefactors.
The new executive vice president will be Rev. Timothy Scully effective July 1. He will rank third in the University hierarchy after Monk and Provost Nathan O. Hatch. Executive VP responsibilities include finance, business operations, human resources, and campus construction. Scully, 46, had been serving as VP & senior associate provost. The Chicago native received his ND degree in economics in '76. In '79 he got his masters in divinity. He was ordained a Holy Cross priest in '81. Then it was on to Berkeley for masters and doctoral degrees in political science. Since 1989 Scully has been a member of the ND faculty as a professor of government and international studies. He is also rumored to be the successor to Monk.
Campus Watch by the Gipper from Scholatic:
A young man rode his bike over to Lyons to pick up his ladylove and, leaving his bike behind, escorted her to an evening at Corby's. The ladylove's roommate went to bed early, only to be awakened at 2:15 am by a loud knock on her door. She tried to ignore the pounding, but the visitor was simply relentless. It was the AR who sheepishly asked if the ladylove was at home. The roommate said, "No, my God, is there something wrong?" Getting an inadequate response, the roommate asked the AR if she was checking for the ladylove's suitor. The AR admitted that, yes, she was. Apparently, the security guard had told the AR at 2 a.m. that she thought the boyfriend was in the sanctified quarters beyond the witching hour. In fact, the security guard, though she'd never met the boyfriend, knew him by name. Here's a security guard who really stays on her game. Her evidence for suspecting the boyfriend's presence was the tell-tale bicycle, which he'd left under the arch. She saw his bike under the arch, pulled out his bike registration and cross-checked it. The guardian had access to a list of bike registration numbers - perfect for keeping tabs on naughty boyfriends. The moral to this story is: If you're a boy, try not to sleep over at Lyons. But if you must venture into that hallowed hall of womanhood during the forbidden hours, be sure to park your hog at the Manor.
Hall Notes:
Here's another Classic Moment in Vermin History that was passed our way by Slim. It concerns the origin of a Vermin nickname and was written by Joseph "Smoothy Joe" Medel. The tales is entitled...."SCOOP"
Place: Carroll Hall
Time: 1:00ish am mid to late September 1985
Event: The first SYR of Vermin Class of '89,
otherwise known as THE BIRTH OF SCOOP ANDRES
So rarely in life do any of us get to see defining moments in other peoples lives. I mean wouldn't it have been great to see Michael Jordan pick up a basketball and slam for the first time? Or see Wayne Gretsky score his first NHL goal? Or even see Neil go into his first Jekyll and Hyde routine whenever his girlfriend (now wife) came to visit him in Carroll? Fortunately, I count myself as one of the few, the lucky few who witnessed such an event in Carroll lore, and I am sure that those of you who were not there hold your manhoods cheap by comparison.
After a night of much joyance and debauchery at this inaugural SYR, I had the pleasure/disgust of witnessing the birth of Scoop. The scene goes something like this:
Scoop had been drinking far more than his 135lb frame could handle at that time of his life (I should know because I actually weighed less than Greg for much of my time under the dome). It involved much Old Swill, Jim Jones Guyana Juice and an assortment of other confections being force fed into his wiry frame. Basically, he was trying to impress his newfound smoothy friends: Scott Tomsik, Paul Salvaty, Todd Maus & Mike Cimino. Late into the dance, Greg decides to go to the first floor bathrooms and remains there for some time. After exiting, Tomsik begins to berate him by screaming, "Dudes, he puked, he puked!" Greg (again under the guise of trying to ingratiate himself to these smoothies) begins to deny it vehemently. He concluded his denial with the following statement which became his eventual downfall: "Wait a sec, I'll prove it to you." At this point, most of you know the rest of the story, but for those of you who weren't there, Greg returns to the lobby with a handful of his own shit and holds it out for all to see and proudly proclaimed, "Seeeeee! I didn't puke!" At this point, my date practically did hurl while the rest of us were on the floor screaming with laughter. I am not sure when Greg figured out that this was clearly a defining moment in his life, but I believe that it must have occurred the next morning when Tomsik printed out a Macintosh illustration of a hand with a pile of shit and posted it on Greg's door with the now infamous "Scoop Andres' residence" noted on it.
And that's all I've got to say about that.
NDSportscenter:
Some leftover Bookstore Notes: Coach Doherty actually took the court one last time this year in the pre-championship All-Star game. He was joined by B-ballers Skylard Owens & David Palmer, the Leprechaun Mike Brown, and various Bookstore players....DE Vermin John Owens of Coco Butter was named to the All-Davie Team. Vermin Arnaz was NOT named to the team, but his highly inferior Bookstore teammate Gary Godsey was... ..This is the first year the brackets were prominently displayed on the net. It was quite necessary as The Observer coverage was horrible. I thought last year's was poor, but this one took the cake....For those of you who didn't catch the Bookstore piece on ESPN, here's a summary: Majority of the clips were of Coach Doherty's team's game versus an all girl team. Coach D was interviewed and they showed his 4 missed dunks. Others interviewed were Tony Rice, Fritz Hoefer (the Bookstore founder), Jimmy Dillon, the operator of the Bookstore, and one of the student commissioners. The tourney was mentioned as an entry in the Guiness Book of World Records for the largest outdoor 5-on-5 tournament. Other videotaped footage included bits and pieces of the wild festivities that made up some of the games. Those included....a pie eating contest during a game, a game of "strip basketball" where points equalled clothing removal, and a game that had a plastic kiddie pool on the baseline for players to leap in. The ESPN anchor alos named her favorite Bookstore team name: Troy Murphy Lives Across The Hall From Us...Don't Make Us Go Get Him.
Big East Women's Basketball Rookie of the Year Alicia Ratay was one of 45 invited to attend the 2000 USA Basketball Women's Summer Development Trials in Colorado Springs. During this past season Ratay averaged 14 ppg and was fourth nationally in 3-point percentage at 48%.
Regardless of what sports illustrated had to say, Irish hockey coach Dave Poulin has said he is staying here and not leaving to coach the Boston Bruins.
Baseball fans keep an eye out for the name Aaron Heilman. He may have an extremely strong future in the Major Leagues. An article has been posted on this Irish athlete.
Campus News:
OUTreachND, the unofficial coalition of gay and lesbian students, applied for the fourth time for official recognition from the University. On April 17th they received a letter from Joe Cassidy, director of Student Activities, denying their request. The letter stated that the University preferred to serve homosexual students through its own groups and not a student run organization.
Classes ended last Wednesday and finals are this week. Besides commencement, the campus news will obviously be slow for the next three months. I'll stretch out what I have, so bear with me.
Campus Watch by the Gipper from Scholastic:
This one student goes to see his professor in Decio. He knocks on the door to the office, and is greeted by a sound like chairs scuffing across the floor and the prof's voice saying, "Uh, just a minute." After a few seconds, the prof cracks open the door and says, "Could you hang on a sec? I need to take care of something." The student says okay, but through the slightly opened door, he sees a woman sitting on a chair in the room. She looks rather disheveled, and her blouse seems to be kind of wrinkled with some buttons undone. She sees the student looking at her, smiles and says, "Oh, don't worry. I'm just his wife." The Gipp has no comment.
Hall Notes:
Well, some of you may have read about the website in ND Magazine. We attempted to contact columns as far back as '77 (minus '79 that did not have email). Of the 22 years, 12 were kind enough to mention the site. Most of the '90s included it except for '90 and '96. The '80s were a tad unhelpful as only '86, '87, and '89 put in a blurb. Old school '77 gave us props and '78 ignored us.
Some of you may have also noticed some new additions to the registry. A member of the Class of '81 and a memeber of the Class of '72 submitted info. Contact has been established with Ken Kozelski '72 in order to receive stories on the history of Carroll. Hopefully other veteran Vermin will find the site and send some tales our way.
NDSportscenter:
Blue-Gold game wrap-up: This year Davie opted to go with some new- fangled confusing scoring system that gave points to the offense AND defense. Sacks were worth 2, a first down 1, a fumble recovery 5, etc. In fact the only touchdown was scored on an INT return by Anthony Denman. That registered 12 points in the scoring system.....The #1 offense initially took on the #2 defense and vice versa. Later the first and second squads mixed. The second string offensive line was weak as four players were in street clothes. The final score was Defense 39, Offense 31.....Thankfully there were no injuries.....The punting was horrendous.....A place kicking competition preceeded the game. David Miller was solid. Nick Setta was average. Walk-on Matt McNew, who played the last four years on the Irish soccer team, hit all his attempts, including a 45-yarder.....The offense was limited as they only ran 10% of the whole package. The option was not attempted even once. Arnaz kept the ball down when hitting receiver's sitting down in the zone, but his accuracy was off quite a bit on the touch passes.....Jabari was utilized and garnered offensive MVP honors.....The attendance was very weak at 14,135. Looked to be as much as 50% less than last year.
Bookstore Elite Eight through Championship: The top 8 seeds advanced as they should have. The #1 and #2 teams - Keyplay.com and NDToday.com - bothed moved on to the Final Four in relative ease. Keyplay included Jimmy Dillon and O-lineman John Teasdale. NDToday had no athletes, but did have B.J Kloska who walked on to the b-ball team last year....The best football team - #6 Coco Butter with RB Tony Fisher, DE Vermin John Owens, and LB Justin Thomas - fell to Versatility, last year's runner-up. #6 Majestics upset #3 Franchise to round out the Final Four
Versatility lost to Keyplay in the semis. Their luck finally ran out. Their lack of size caught up with them. It was Ross Hansen's last Bookstore. He was named 1st team All-Bookstore and was the best shooter I've seen in 7 years. No wonder he was a D-I prospect.....NDToday beat Majestics easily. Majestics had a player who was recruited by Iowa State, but that mattered little. They looked like they had partied too much the night before as they put a mininal fight.....So the teams originally ranked 1 & 2 met in the finals.
Kloska, who was named 1st team All-Bookstore, gave Dillon all he could handle. No team lead by more than 2 until the end. Dillon came up with three huge buckets in what basically amounted to the last quarter of the game. He hit an amazing reverse lay-up that didn't look like it had a prayer. Then he threw down an alley-oop and followed that up with a bomb from NBA range. Keyplay went on to win 21-17. Dillon's teammate, Tom Dietrick, scored 8 points and was named MVP. Mr. Bookstore was senior Steve Craig of Franchise. He won it all as a sophomore on PRIMTIME in '98.
Campus News:
George Dohrmann '94 recently became the fourth Domer to receive a Pulitzer Prize. You know that whole scandal with the University of Minnesota's basketball program? Well, Dohrmann was the guy who brought down the house. The Prize was given for his beat reporting and investigation of academic fraud. He broke the story in the St. Paul Pioneer Press after three months of research and interviews. Dohrmann was The Observer's sports editor in '93 and '94. The former American Studies major has only had his St. Paul job since August of '97. Now maybe he can move on to Tallahassee.
The three other Domer Pulitzer Prize winners are.....playwright John Patrick for drama in 1954, Edwin O'Connor for fiction in 1962, and sports columnist Red Smith in 1976.
Campus Watch by the Gipper from Scholastic:
The Gipp heard about a certain young maiden in the Liturgical Choir who wears nothing but her own sweet self under her robe each Sunday. Ten o'clock Mass at the Basilica has never been so appealing.
Hall Notes:
Our very own webmaster, Jim "Sweet Baby" Zawada, recently had his graduate studies proclaimed in Stanford's Winter 2000 "Stanford Graduate Fellowship News". Here's the piece...
Converging Visionaries
Profile of a fellow and his advisor
Professor Jim Swartz and graduate student Jim Zawada came to Stanford for the same reason: they wanted to work in an environment where they would have freedom to choose their research projects. By supporting the students regardless of what they decide to study, SGF encourages the convergence of people with good ideas.
Last September, Dr. Swartz came to Stanford from Genentech, Inc. He says that, unlike the corporate development environment, Stanford encourages him to be a dreamer by allowing him the freedom to pursue research at a basic level. Stanford also gives him the opportunity to work with bright students. "It is wonderful to see developing professionals accept and expand the knowledge that defines my areas of interest."
Although the job is fun, assembling a new course and learning to teach effectively is not easy, especially while simultaneously working to set up a new research lab. Typically, not having the financial resources of an established lab makes attracting and supporting graduate students next to impossible. Dr. Swartz says that the SGF program, through its support of Jim Zawada, has helped him expand his own program faster than he had thought possible.
Jim Zawada became interested in working with Dr. Swartz while Dr. Swartz was in the process of being hired. Because Jim had his own funding, he was able to start working with Dr. Swartz right away. Jim is excited about their project. He explains: "Cell-free protein synthesis systems have the potential to provide researchers with an extremely flexible and simple alternative to fermentation for protein production. The systems could be used to facilitate protein design and studies of protein structure. Potentially, this approach also offers low-cost production for pharmaceutical and industrial proteins. Our system might even help speed discoveries leading to treatments or vaccines for diseases ranging from the common cold to AIDS."
Jim's project will contribute to these goals by increasing the efficiency of the system. The present cell-free systems are less than 30 percent efficient, and energy supply is the most expensive component in the reaction. Jim is trying to identify and remove the components responsible for the inefficiency.
Dr. Swartz says of SGF, "I think it is a wonderful program that attracts and rewards excellence. It is both important and innovative. I am involved with it through no merit of my own, and so it is a wonderful privilege to be included."
Here's the actual link... http://www.stanford.edu/dept/DoR/Fellows/4_visionaries.html
NDSportscenter:
The 71st Blue-Gold game was on Saturday, as was the Bookstore Final Four. The Bookstore Championship followed on Sunday.
The Blue-Gold wrap-up will be next week. Some final spring notes: The offensive line was plagued by injuries even in the spring. Tackle Kurt Vollers barely played at all this spring before spraining his neck and ending his playing until next Fall. Guard Jim Jones suffered a sprained knee and alos put in minimal time.....Carlos Pierre-Antoine was out for a bit with a throat infection.....Javin Hunter had mono.... Not only were players injured, but coaches were as well. Kevin Rogers is recovering from a hip replacement. Hell, even old school Ara Parseghian is dinged up after knee replacement surgery.....Some of the freshman-to-be wide receivers came to spring ball. They are allowed to observe and receive the playbook.....Ticket applications should have arrived by now if you sent in your money for the lottery.
This week's Bookstore update will cover rounds leading up to the Elite Eight: #11 Hit Squad with Eric Chappell and Raki Nelson were booted for having a team that consisted of too many athletes. They had had (legally) three football players, but when Joe Ferrer was unavailable they picked up Javin Hunter. Well, Hunter was a walk-on varsity b-ball player last year and therefore could only play with one f-ball player. Carpe Diem was named the winner and they were even able to advance to the Round of 32 without their go-to guy, ND assistant b-ball coach Fred Quartlebaum.....I believe the Iron Man Award is sown up. One lad dislocated a shoulder, popped it back in, and kept playing....#22 Sexual Frustation V had ND b-ball senior Skylard Owens. They beat Carpe Diem to advance to the Sweet 16 and eliminated Doherty's last remaining assistant coach.....#6 Coco Butter not only had Tony Fisher, but also Lee Lafayette, a track athlete, and DE Vermin John Owens..... a chick actually made it all the way to 32. She was a team member of DT Vermin Tony Weaver's team for every game....."The Torch" sponsored a team. They supplied jerseys to the players. How ironic that The Torch gave out tops.....Todd Palmer's team did not advance to 8..... Vermin Arnaz Battle is a baller! He played with Jim Molinaro and Gary Godsey. They also failed to make it to 8.....All the favorites made it to 8.....Deke Cooper and A'Jani Sanders were away due to football and their team lost.....A Moreau Seminary team made it to 16. But those priests-to-be made it no farther. They didn't have a prayer..... #6 Coco Butter made it to 8 after a 30-28 game that lasted almost 2 hrs.....The #27 team actually tried to pick me up to play against Coco Butter in the round of 32. I wasn't dressed to play and, of course, had no eligibility which would undoubtedly have been checked. Their fifth went down with an injury and somebody told them about me so I was sought out as I was just standing there watching a game. So close and yet so far.
Sportscenter finally aired the piece on Bookstore in its "Beyond the Game" segment during the 9:30 AM Saturday, April 29th Sportscenter. Too bad the announcement was too late.
Campus News:
MCATs were last weekend. That's usually not newsworthy, but this year there was a twist. It seems that last year some students were waiting outside the testing area with some brew to comfort their fellow classmates after they endured the exam. Well, the University didn't take too kindly to that and threatened to stop offering the testss. Students who registered this year discovered that the nearest available location was......Northwestern. Enough people cried foul, though, and the University removed its head from its ass. So ND hosted and had security crawling all over the exam area. Yes, you read that right. Security was present and keeping the prisoners in line. In addition to that, the University has cancelled the Graffiti Dance that is held during Freshman Orientation. It was viewed as a "meat market." Upperclassmen honing in on freshmen, alcohol, and the discomfort of introverted students also contributed to the cancellation. The event was also seen as more about getting a date than meeting people of the opposite sex. Yet another tradition down the tubes.
Campus Watch by the Gipper from Scholastic:
Greetings, campers. The Gipp has an important news briefing. Since Scholastic rarely features news from other colleges, the Gipp has been nominated to spread this fascinating news. There is a college in suburban Philadelphia in the process of changing the name it has held onto since its founding in 1853: Beaver College. The problem is that the term "beaver" is locked out by parental web controls, and college-hunting kids can't find it on the web. In other words, when the powers taht be go about selecting a new names, something like "Boner University" probably won't cut it. The Gipp feels that the problem here is not the name of the school but the presence of parental web controls on high school kids. Down with censorship, says the Gipp. Support the Gipp's cause and call 1-888-BEAVER-3 to schedule your campus tour.
Hall Notes:
A couple weeks ago a new Carroll tradition was born. On April 8th the first annual Carroll Hall Fusic Festival (a tradition of food and music) took place. The food was provided by Wolfies, Dominos, Papa John's, and Dairy Queen. The grub was given in exchange for different quantities of food tickets which were on sale for 50 cents per ticket. All profits went to support the Make-A-Wish Foundation. Four bands played the event: NAZZ winner Sexual Chocolate, D-BoNeZ, Doc Brown, and the Carroll Hall House Band. The event was to take place on the front lawn of Carroll, but on the morning of the 8th an inch of snow was on the ground. To Stepan Center! I happened to check out the festivities and the turnout was solid. Grand idea by the present Vermin.
NDSportscenter:
Only one Irish player was selected in the NFL draft. For the first time since 1981, we did not have a player go in the top 3 rounds. Jarious was taken in the last round (7th) by the Denver Broncos. He was the 11th QB drafted and the 241st selection overall. The task of making 3rd string will not be easy.
Nine other Domers were signed on to teams as free agents: Bobby Brown to the Packers; Lamont Bryant to Washington; the Cardinals grabbed Deke Cooper; Joey Goodspeed by the Steelers; Carolina wanted Deveron Harper; Raki Nelson signed with the Eagles; Vermin Ronnie Nicks to San Fran; A'Jani Sanders also went to Carolina, and finally Chicago snapped up Brad Williams.
Bookstore updates: Tony Rice's team lasted one game. Tony is a recruiter for ND (and therefore "on staff") and was able to play. However he lives in Chicago and getting to the Bend was a chore. He made it for the first game, but was out of town for the second. His team lost.....The #1 team looks to be a heavy favorite. Keyplay.com was already the #1 seed and then they picked up Jimmy Dillon. Pretty good pickup.....Jabari Holloway, one of the top pigskin ballers, decided not to play this year....Coach Doherty and assistant coach Doug Wojcik were absent on a recruiting trip and their teams (#29 Shocker and #30 We've Got Your Wojo) fell.
ESPN stiffed us on the Bookstore segment. It got bumped. No news yet on when it will air.
The women's swimming and diving teams went to the NCAA Championships and placed 18th overall, improving 10 spots from the '99 finish. Junior Carrie Nixon was named an All-American. Sophomore Heather Mattingly became the first diver to garner honors as she was named honorable mention All-American. The 400 medley relay earned honorable mention All-American honors with the best ever Irish relay finish of 9th place. A slew of other honorable mention All-American honors were passed out as the Irish made their best showing ever.
Campus News:
U.S. News World Report came out with its law school rankings and we were at 26. Last year we were 21st. Supposedly we received a 3.3 out of 5.0 (whatever that means). But we received a 3.6 in reputation amongst judges and lawyers. So we scored higher with people who actually hire our graduates. Rumor has it that these rankers were also behind the '93 college football fiasco. Our previously unranked business school vaulted to 48th. Expect that position to shift even higher next year after the recent gift by Tom Mendoza '73 and his wife, Kathy. The newly named "Mendoza College of Business" received $35 million, the single largest monetary gift in ND history. Kathy will serve on the advisory council of the college. The Mendoza made their fortune with Network Appliance (stock ticker: NTAP), the leading provider of network attached data access and management solutions. It was rated the 4th fastest growing company by Fortune Magazine in 1999. The "Generations" campaign is now over $900 million thanks to the Mendoza gift. The new money will go toward the College of Business faculty, curriculum development, new course offerings, and technology infrastructure for business education. All that money goes to ONLY the College of Business. Word on the street is that when Mendoza attended ND he was actually an Arts & Letters student. No Arts & Letters buildings were in need of a name, however. So they put their money elsewhere, despite the fact that the College of Business ALREADY had a tidy nestegg while the College of Arts & Letters continues to be the most underdeveloped college on campus.
Campus Watch by the Gipper from Scholastic:
The Gipp wants to send a special thank you to the member of the administration who sent a letter to numerous faculty members asking that attendance be taken in all classes and exams be scheduled for Mondays and Fridays. Apparently this administrator thinks Friday tests will stop binge drinking, but the Gipp thinks it will just mean fewer people make the Dean's List.
Hall Notes:
Michael "Q" Bergan '95 will add a "'00" after his name this May as he receives his masters. Here's what Q had to say about his next adventure.... I'm headed to the Fuqua (Few-kwa) School of Business at Duke University to work on a Ph.D. in finance. Duke's business school is rated relatively well. The MBA program was started in 1984 and is already ranked 8th in the country by U.S. News & World Report. I plan to specialize in corporate finance. The degree should take five years to complete. Since graduating in '95 with a B.B.A. in finance, I've worked for General Electric for 3.5 years as a financial analyst and worked on a Master's Degree in Applied Mathematics at Notre Dame. I plan to continue studying at ND until graduation in late May, work for GE Investments in Stamford, CT this summer and then head to North Carolina in August.
NDSportscenter:
Bookstore Basketball started last Monday. A total of 538 teams registered. Last year's freshman runner-up team, Versatility, is this year's #3 seed. But they lost their best player as he walked on to the men's team. Malicious Prosecution, last year's champ, only return one player and are #16. B.J. Kloska is on #2 NDToday.com and Tony Fisher is on #6 Cocoa Butter. Vermin Arnaz Battle and Bobby Brown star on #10 Rampage while Raki Nelson and Eric Chappell anchor #11 Hit Squad. A few others.....Tom Lopienski & #14 The Individuals; Vermin Tony Weaver & #21 Manual Steering; Brad Williams, Jason Ching, & #27 Scottie Who?; and Mike Gandy & #31 campusmonster.com
Now comes the ever popular team name breakdown...
Of course there are the expected...
If You Think She Can Wrestle, You Should See Her Box
Nappy Dugout
Guys Who Dribble Between Their Legs
Hot Carl and the Steamers
A Shooter and Four Loads
Mach I Jizm
Here are a few chick teams...
5 Girls that suck but can still handle the ball
We'll go down in public
We'll take a knee (because we suck)
We may live on the bottom, but we like it on the top
S'more innuendo fo ya....
(Here's an obvious co-ed team).....2 Baskets, 6 Balls
(A nice twist to a children's classic).....Bi-Curious George
We don't know about you, but we got Head on our team....(they are
captained by Greg Head)
(And another chap captained)......Tampax Was There
Yo, some mom jokes.....
1-900-TU-MADRE
YourMom.com: Quick, Easy, and Affordable
A couple ND related names...
We have Bill Kirk: show up drunk, we dare you
DuLac Shakur
Troy Murphy Lives Across the Hall from Us...don't make us go get him
A few oddities...
John Tesh Live - The Final Show
One Investment Banker and 4 guys with a life
DVD, 8-track, and 3 other players
4 guys and a kid shorter, fatter, and balder than Brian Cardinal (pimpi?)
Charismatic Whoop-Ass
Sweet Donkey Lovin'
John Rocker and the Teletubbies
Navajo Playgrounds and Cherokee Parks
And my personal favorite...
Matt Clark and 4 guys that haven't herniated themselves on the toilet
(Note to self: Eat more bran.)
Two articles have also been posted about Tony Rice (yes, that Tony Rice) and Coach Doherty playing in Bookstore.
ESPN will be airing a feature on Bookstore as a part of its "Beyond the Game" segment on Sportscenter. The piece will air on Saturday, April 22nd as part of the 9:30 am Sportscenter. (This information was taken off of an ND website so I'm assuming the time is Central, but check your local listings.)
Campus News:
More miscellaneous news....
Indiana U.S. Representative and Domer Tim Roemer has the backing of ND in supporting a bill banning wagering on high school, college, and Olympic events in order to protect the integrity of the game. The House says this bill passes......no times.
Supposedly a South Bend Center for Medical Education will be built in the not to distant future on the southeast corner of Angela and Notre Dame Avenue. Apparently it will serve as a location for the first two years of med school. It is in conjunction with Indiana University, where the remaining med school years will be conducted.
ND has the highest percentage of students participating in study abroad programs among American research universities. Abroad programs used to be 85% Arts & Letters students, but now it's down to 50% A&L what with the London (pre-med oriented physics program) and Dublin (science) locations.
Campus Watch by the Gipper from Scholastic:
One tipper writes in: "Uconn players shouldn't only be chided for their fertility. While playing the Victory March after the game, one of the players punched me in the stomach. I could not identify who it was before he ran into the tunnel. It was not a very strong punch, no black and blue marks, and I am sure he did not wish to injure me. Still, it is the first time I have ever been assaulted by a member of the opposing team." The Gipp replies: Hang tough, Band Boy. The Gipp applauds you for taking the hit like a man, but get ready for more because this b-ball team is going to send many more angry adversaries off the court. And God bless you, Matt Doherty.
Hall Notes:
Last week in the sports section, Vermin Tony Weaver was mentioned. Well, Carroll also has a couple other young players that have some spring football news. Freshman Chris Yura spent this past season at strong safety. (Actually he only really played on special teams.) Yura is reportedly now being moved to tailback, a position he excelled at in high school. Vermin sophomore John Owens, who was listed at tight end during the '99 season, is now at defensive end. But recent injuries at TE may have him pulling double duty for awhile. DE seems to be his calling, though.
NDSportscenter:
Troy Murphy announced on Friday that he IS coming back for his junior year. He had until May 14 to file as an underclassman for the draft but wanted to get it out of the way. He failed to become the first Irish player since Adrian Dantley in 1976 to leave early for the NBA. For one year anyway. Two articles have been posted from the week prior to Murphy's decision.
Spring practice officially started last weekend. It will end with the Blue-Gold Game on April 29th.
Arnaz's shoulder is cleared to go. Our 6'1" quarterback has gone from a 192 pounder with 6% body fat to a 212 pounder with 7% body fat after a winter beefing.
Future schedule additions: a 12th game has been added in 2003 at Syracuse; in an 11 game season in 2005 we will get Syracuse at home; the 3rd 'Cuse meeting will be at home in the 2008 12-game season.
Two Notre Dame Scouting Combines were conducted on campus for hopeful players. At one 12 players from the '99 team performed in front of 15 NFL scouts. Deveron Harper's stock reportedly went up the most. The Chicago Bears representative gave the thumbs up to Deke Cooper. Vermin Ronnie Nicks was also on hand which means he will not be coming back for a medical fifth year. Benny Guilbeaux, a senior from the '98 team, was showing his skills for the second year in a row in hopes of making it to the big time. Even Jim Sanson was being talked to by an agent. (All I have to say about that is...... ...why?)
For the fifth straight year our Fencing team finished second. They tied St. John's for runner-up behind Penn State, who has won 6 straight titles.
Campus News:
Time to take care of a few odds and ends...
The cost of attending ND for the '99-'00 school year was $27,780. Over the past 20 years that averages out to a 5.7% increase from the '78-'79 price tag of $5,180. Now if the cost of education had risen at the rate of inflation the '99-'00 price would have been $12,846. Quite the discrepancy.
The total endowment now stands at $2.2 billion. That ranks us 15th among private universities.
University Provost Nathan Hatch addressed the faculty senate on the issues of woman and minority faculty. Over the past three years the women faculty percentage has risen from 16 to 19%. Minority faculty, meanwhile, still sits at 12%.
'97 Domer Meghan (Mahoney) Fatur recently appeared on ABC's "Who Wants to be a Millionair?" She was one of the 10 contestants vying for the chair opposite Regis. She had two opportunities but was the second fastest each time and did not advance to the luxurious center chair.
A Letter to the Editor about the Notre Dame Spirit has been posted. It was written about the love the ND Family is showing toward one of its own - Conor Murphy, a student recently diagnosed with leukemia. This passed Wednesday hundreds of students waited for hours just to donate bone marrow in hopes that it may match. Love thee Notre Dame.
Campus Watch by the Gipper from Scholastic:
A bunch of Dillon men wanted to host a little after-party for the junior parents to follow the JPW dinner. So they rented ou the Boat Club. Some might think that parents would be turned off by such a place as the Boat Club, but these Dillonites knew better. They heard the voice in the cornfields whispering to them in their sleep, "If you rent it, they will come." And, boy, those cornfields had the right idea. The night was loud and wild - these are just some of the highlights....A couple of junior parents, wearing all plaid, were seen country line dancing to that Boat Club favorite, "Back That Ass Up." There was a strange little old man that filled up the cups of anyone who said hello to him, and after the DJ announced a slow song, the parents filled the dance floor and began jamming the night away to "Sexual Healing." Finally, during that 20 Fingers classic, "Short Dick Man," somebody's mother exclaimed in horror, "I just don't understand this song!"
Hall Notes:
Not only did Slim pass on word of himself last week, but he also forwarded numerous old school stories from another Vermin mailing list. Here's one from, I believe, the late '80s. Notice the term "WASTER." As I was told, their were rival groups in the dorm known as WASTERS and DUDERS. Apparently they were the new school "West Side Story" Sharks and Jets sans rhythm. The author of this Classic Moment in Vermin History entitled "H2O and The Revengers' Tale" is Joseph Medel...
Ah yes, the ever popular water drop... While I never had the actual pleasure of partaking in our Vermin Baptism, this does remind me of the first snow storm I experienced while at ND. It was about 10 years ago just before October Break & the flakes began to fall around midnight during the middle of the week. The usual euphoria began to take place (I'm sure all of you can remember the first time you saw snow fall like napalm during your tenure at the lovely Dome) while my roommates & I were happily sawing logs in the fishbowl. We (being myself, Mick O'Connell, Chris Matz, & Toc Dan Ton) began to hear shuffling outside & much screaming. Paying no heed, we laughed it off and went back to bed. Suddenly, the dreaded sound of overly tired, freezing wet Vermin approached our door and with a loud kick, was flung open and we were bombarded with snowballs in our toasty beds by none other than those scoundrels from Dante's Inferno, the WASTERS. After we cleared the tundra from our hair, pillows, blankets & comforters we began to formulate a plan of revenge that would have made Shakespeare proud. The loveliest aspect of which was the shear simplicity. Housed somewhere near the now Ultramodern, sterile & barless TV lounge was the largest trash recepticle in Carroll hall. After having dumped the contents, Chris, Mick & I (Toc was planning a more devious martial arts- Titus Andronicus-meets- Rumplestiltskin-type revenge which would not take place until years after the snowballing) filled the 20 gallon trash can with cold water, leaned it very precariously against the WASTERS' door and finished our revenge with a simple coup de grace:
We knocked.
What followed was a sound similar to that of a herd of pigs being flung down the Niagra Falls in a small basket. The ensuing dank squeals of agony, pain & humiliation tore thru Carroll. It was as if someone had been watching Deliverance with the volume turned up to 11 (the tortured face of Ned Beatty comes to mind).
We simply laughed the hollow laugh of those who had been previously tortured in an all boys parochial high school.
While the WASTERS vowed revenge, they never did manage to match the sheer intensity of that preemptive strike. They retailiated with similar force (we never answered the door), they tried to force hydrodynamics on us (we plugged the doorway with rags & old towels) and they even tried petrochemical lubricants (we used gloves whenever we turned our doorknobs).
To this day, whenever you walk into that room on the first floor, you will probably notice that the floor is still a little damp, the room still a little humid and if you listen closely, you can hear...
...the stillness of pigs...
...squealing....
in the falls.
NDSportscenter:
In the NIT semi-final the Irish abused Penn State 73-52. They then fell to Wack Forest 71-61 after a pathetic display or shooting and rebounding.
An article has been included concerning Murphy and whether he should stay or go pro.
Spring football started this weekend. Well, Tony Driver has more problems. Seems he cut his finger on a broken plate while washing dishes. He sliced a tendon and will most likely be wearing a cast the entire spring. Good thing he's playing safety and not carrying the ball.
S'more spring notes....Tony Weaver (Vermin) is now going back to DT. He's gone from DE to DT to DE and now back to DT. Supposedly it will be more of a "roaming" DT from side to side as Lance Legree will be more of a gap NT...Irons and Darrell Campbell are slated for DEs.... a new kicker has entered the fold. Matt McNew was previously on the soccer team for four years and is using his fifth varsity year to play football.
FYI: Rumors were abound that Terrance Howard was transferring to Pittsburgh. Not true. However, that is where Darcy Levy ended up. For those of you that did not know, Levy was the player who had a paper written for him by a tutor. The tutor was Eric Chappell's girlfriend. She was paing $20-30 for a management class paper on which Darcy received an "F". Oh, yeah, the deal with Chappell and those complimentary tickets was that he "traded" them in order to pay off a $200 debt.